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How Emotional Liberation can help you

How Emotional Liberation can help you

Working with GuruMeher can help you:

  • Develop greater love for yourself
  • Have greater compassion for others
  • Gain more control over your moods and reactions
  • Free yourself from pain from the past and the limitations trauma imposes on your life

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Sweden, Copenhagen & CT – A Mind and Meditation Journey

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 2, 2018 
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Hej hej – that’s hello in Swedish,
I recently returned from teaching Mind and Meditation in Sweden, Copenhagen and Connecticut and I want to share my incredible experience with you through the pictures below.
My first stop is a Swedish bakery!  
Mangalam, a sacred space to teach Mind and Meditation.

 

Live music for early morning meditation.

Hearty Scandinavians meditating outdoors at 40 degrees. 

My cozy cottage; I sat here working on my next book. 

Sunset with swans on my last evening in Sweden.

Then a train to Dalgas Yoga Copenhagen to teach M&M again. 

On the way home, a stop at Yoga4Everybody in Fairfield, Connecticut to join Hari NYC for more Mind and Meditation!  

A kayak adventure on the Long Island Sound.brought me to a sweet reminder of what teaching is all about.

“You are a lighthouse, so nobody else can wreck near you. That is the one thing in life you have to do. Spread the light. Be the lighthouse. So every journey, every destiny, every distance will be safe.”        Yogi Bhajan 11/1987
Blessings, GuruMeher
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Ageism Series (Articles 1-5)

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· October 31, 2017 
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Ageism Article #1 – The Prejudice You Are Perpetuator and Victim Of
As a white male, it’s been important for me to study racism and sexism, to understand how I unknowingly participate from the oppressors’ side. Now I want to talk about THE PREJUDICE WE ALL SHARE – AGE-ISM.
– Olders are the last group that it’s still okay for we/ the to ridicule: slow, stupid, smelly, useless…
– Statistics verify the harm age discrimination does to olders: economically, medically, socially, psychologically…
– All biases diminish, demote, reject, discount and serve an untruth: “they are not me, I am better.”
Despite the strides being made against racism, sexism, homophobia, Ageism remains the least recognized and most socially sanctioned prejudice! But here’s the crazy thing, in ageism, we are hating our future selves, for we are all aging and HOPE to join the group we now reject!
As an expert on emotions I recognize the all-important role of self-esteem. Your sense of self-value and place in society is shaped by how you are viewed and treated by others. When that input is negative it can break your heart and your will to be your best. So when you have even unconscious attitudes (intrinsic bias) – Wrinkles are ugly. Old people are incompetent. It’s sad to be old – you can’t avoid feeling bad about yourself when you become an older person.
Prejudice unrecognized is perpetuated, and it’s hard to recognize when you are doing it, but very obvious when it happens to you. My hope is that the prejudice, which everyone will feel and want to be free from, could bring an understanding and reduction of all prejudice. And the more immediate benefit to you is not to deny or fight the natural process of aging, but to accept its challenges and embrace its benefits.
Join me for the next few weeks to explore Ageism and help your future self to be happy at every stage. To adapt Yogi Bhajan’s sutra: Recognize that the older person is you!
To educate yourself along with this series, I suggest This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism by Ashton Applewhite.
Blessings, GuruMeher
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Ageism Article #2 –How Does OLD Make You Feel? Unlearn That Aging is Bad!
Does growing old fill you with anxiety or sadness? What do you feel about old people, disgust, pity or nothing at all? How do you feel about your age, mad or embarrassed? About getting old, dread or despair?
These common and nearly universal responses motivated author and activist Ashton Applewhite, to look at her own darkest thoughts of aging and found that her darkest fears were much worse than the facts:
 Only 4% of Americans over 65 live in nursing homes.
 Of people 85 and up, over half of them can go about their daily activities without assistance.
 The vast majority of older Americans live independently until they come down with whatever kills them.
 Dementia? Rates are dropping; fear of Alzheimer’s affects more people than the disease.
 Sexual activity tends to decrease with age yet retirement homes are full with romance.
 Depression? Older people enjoy better mental health than the young or middle-aged.
Why do so few know that statistically people are happiest early AND late in their lives? When Ashton found that the facts tell a very different story than our beliefs and feelings about aging, she went deep to unlearn her fear and loathing of aging. She can best explain her remarkable discoveries to you. Please take 12 minutes to begin turning around your own aging attitudes.
Keep pushing back on your own Ageism as this series continues.
Blessings, GuruMeher
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Ageism Article #3 – Get Real – Feeling Better & Dealing Better with Aging

Everyone worries about getting old. Will I have enough money? Will I be alone? Will I get sick? These fears are real. I’ve been sharing with you the facts about aging because the more you know the better you feel about the myths, and the better you can deal with the realities of the years ahead. The biggest fears and myths are: no more sex, loss of independence, loss of health, loss of mental capacity. Regarding the fear of forgetting, remember this:

– Serious mental decline is not a normal or inevitable part of aging.
– Most forgetfulness is not Alzheimer's or dementia and can be accommodated.
– About 20% of people in their nineties seem to escape any cognitive decline at all!

And even as the population ages, dementia rates are falling, significantly. And people are being diagnosed older and older.  So what can you do about normal brain aging?

We all know how important it is to stay physically fit. Move your body so blood goes to the brain. Walk frequently. Do yoga daily. Partner dancing tops the list for reducing mental and physical decline!
We must also do mental activity to fend off cognitive decline. Devote 3 hours a day to creative and
mentally engrossing activity. Novelty, complexity and problem solving are key! Learn a new language, play a musical instrument.

What about the positive aspects of aging on the brain?
A 2015 study in Psychological Science studied cognitive abilities in people of all ages and found that
four types of proficiencies didn’;t fully ripen until people were in their fifties: vocabulary, math, general knowledge and comprehension. Scientists, psychologists and geriatricians agree that the older brain holds potential for deep creativity and intellectual potential.

When it comes to emotions, older brains are more resilient. Frontal lobe changes improve our ability to deal with anger, envy and fear. The normal aging brain enables greater emotional maturity, adaptability to change, and levels of well-being. As you mature, you get more philosophical. Things don’t upset you as much. Think of all the knowledge and experience you gain as you age. Not allolder people are wise, but aging definitely offers the opportunity to develop wisdom.

What about the other standard myths about loss of sex, health, independence, etc.? The outcomes
are as varied as humans are. All age-related changes can be understood, anticipated, diminished,
embraced, accommodated so we can all enjoy the tremendous gifts that long life affords. See more
on these topics: Ashton Applewhite, This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism

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Ageism Article #4 – Hag Geezer Fogey Crone Bag Biddy Codger Coot

It takes one to know one! Ageism is a prejudice against our future selves. It doesn’t make sense to discriminate against a group that we hope to join! So put aside fear and ignorance and learn about the beauty of your older self.

In the 20th century we added an unprecedented number of years to our lifespans, but is the quality of life as good? Surprisingly, yes! In contrast to the doubts and insecurities of youth, growing older
enables us to become more self-aware and confident, less fearful of being judged, more authentically happy. Studies prove that aging isn’t a steady decent into misery; it’s a continuous process of personal development.
Maybe we do slow down, choose more carefully how we spend our time and with whom, but that is because we have finally figured out what matters most and feel free to follow that. Instead of the youthful and middle-aged obsession with doing, we gently segue into the immense value in being.
Sounds spiritual to me! But our culture prizes productivity and paychecks, it values doing over being. So if we choose to enjoy life, connection or quiet meditation we are seen as less “productive” and less valuable to society. Let us define successful ageing by recognizing these social expectations and choosing what feels right for us.
Psychologist Laura Carstensen says, “As we grow older our time horizons shorten and our goals change,” to live in the moment, know what’s important, invest in sure things, deepen relationships and savor life”. She shares her research that demonstrates that as people get older they become happier, more content, and have a more positive outlook on the world in this TedTalk. Watch her 12-minute video to update your view of aging:

If we embrace this natural process, we can be more realistic and optimistic about what lies ahead. The sooner growing older is stripped of dread and apprehension, the better equipped we are to
benefit from the countless ways it will enrich us.

Blessings, GuruMeher
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Ageism Article #5 – Push Back on Ageism: Be an Old Person in Training
If you think the topic of Ageism is just for older people, WRONG! Everyone is older than they were, and is constantly getting older. Aging has or will harm every person’s life and sense of self. Other
prejudices influence the effect: affluence buys more health and comfort, older women are currently valued less than older men, experience gained over years is ignored in hiring. Compounded biases
make poor, old women of color the most neglected people worldwide! Young people get it too; heard any attitudes about millennial?You may be in a dominant gender, race, sexual orientation, physical health, religion or social status and never have experienced oppression, but because everyone has or will experience negative,
socialized age-based attitudes and behaviors it can open our eyes to all unfair judgments and treatment. The common experience of aging unites us all. If we dismantle the fear and ignorance around aging we help our future selves and can tackle other forms of prejudice. And it starts with you.
When I was young, “Say it loud, I’m black and I’m proud,” helped African-Americans to build self-esteem and push back against injustice. Embracing aging helps us accept and love ourselves with
pride at every age.
Geriatrician Joanne Lynn suggests that any age we become an “old person in training.” How? By ditching preconceptions, looking at and listening carefully to the olders around us, and re-envisioning our place among them. It means looking at older people instead of past them, remembering they were once our age, seeing resilience alongside infirmity, allowing for sensuality, enlarging our notion of beauty… “
See through the marketing campaigns that make you feel bad about your body, skin, hair, health to create billion dollar markets in beauty products, diets, pharmaceuticals. Your discontent makes them money. Embrace grey hair as a privilege, white hair as beautiful. Wrinkles as well earned. When you see yourself as natural and beautiful, no one can shame you and enough women feeling their hot, wise, graceful older elegance will make it the cool thing to do.
The less I fight the changes of aging and embrace the benefits, the more I love my life. It’s a process, takes time, and is SO worth it.
Serenity prayer says it all:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference. -Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971).

Some questions to help you understand and change:

  • What are some of the assumptions you hold about getting older?
  • Where have they come from and what purpose do they serve? Are they fact, myth, belief?
  • What are your fears and other feelings about older people and aging?
  • What about your age-related self do you reject?
  • What can you surrender to that you cannot control?
  • What can you do to plan for and take care of your future older self?
  • Make a list of all the great things about living long; the opportunities, experiences, and joys.
  • How can we make the world a better place to get old in?

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. -“Desiderata” by Max Ehrmann

Blessings, GuruMeher
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I did it, made it through 40 days…

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 22, 2017 
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I did it, made it through 40 days…
What I learned from the Handle Your Heat 40-Day Practice that anger, like any of my emotions, can serve as an ally if I am willing to face it as a teacher and a trusted friend who has something important to tell me about myself – as opposed to some kind of character defect.
However, like any practice, the benefits are only maximized and sustained if I make sure it is a “daily” 40- day practice. Discipline and steadiness can be difficult, but daily discipline when it comes to my spiritual practice has been the key to my results and my growing freedom.
When I started out on this 40-day meditation, I would struggle to keep my arm up. When I started accepting the sadness, pain, frustration and rage that arose through my forceful breath, I heard my anger asking me to think about the many times in the past I have gotten angry. So angry at people, situations, perceived slights… And how I made myself – and sometimes others – so miserable and hurt through my outward reaction to the anger…
And then I heard anger say, “Yet, here you are, and you’re ok. So how bad could any of it really have been?”
After having this experience over the first few days of the practice, I realized my anger had taught me to feel it, learn from it, and utilize the energy for positive action – not rage or knee jerk reactions. Slowly but surely, my arm started staying up without me even thinking about it. I’m still learning, but day-by-daily practice, I’m becoming more peaceful.
There is a Ray Bradbury quote I love: “You’ve got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down.” I agree, and also feel that it sure does help if you have some wing building materials when you jump! That is what a daily practice gives me. It allows me to live in the moment while being prepared to face the wonder and mystery of each of those moments as the spiritual being I long to be.
– Dan Erickson
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Is Yoga Enough? Emotional Balance 2.0

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· July 24, 2017 
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Emotional Balance 2.0
When you feel bad, doing Kundalini Yoga makes you feel better. Stressed and upset? Do a strong set and you can become calm and peaceful. There are many kriyas and meditations specifically for emotional balance, to get rid of fear and anger, and to release negative thoughts. It is not unusual in class to cry spontaneously and then leave feeling good. Kundalini Yoga powerfully cleanses, strengthens and generates positive emotional states. This is Emotional Balance 1.0. It is wonderful. And it is not enough!
Seeking pleasure, even at this higher spiritual level, and avoiding pain is fundamentally what yoga advises us to transcend. The yogi lives beyond polarity in neutrality. Avoiding the dark side of our fears, negative thoughts and other heavy feelings leads to inauthenticity, pretention, spiritual bypassing, neurosis, and eventually physical and mental illness. The soul moves us steadily toward wholeness. So not dealing with our wounds and their emotional patterns causes cracks in any spiritual veneer, eventually.
A strong practice, serviceful acts and attitude, devotion and positive thinking are like getting on a great diet; they build mental/emotional strength and health quickly while detoxing us psychologically. Positive practice is the permanent foundation, but if there are cracks-unattended wounds in the psyche-they will show up and grow in time.
Call it “falling from grace,” freaking out, Shakti Pad or just falling apart, there is no lack of cautionary tales from great teachers, leaders and sincere spiritual practitioners who have lost their precious progress, stature and spiritual “capital” due to masking and avoidance.
When we seek and value only the comfortable “positive” emotions while ignoring or repressing the uncomfortable “negative” feelings as most yogas, therapies, spiritual paths and society in general do, we later find pain unavoidable as the soul pushes issues to the surface so they can be resolved. In the Aquarian Age there is no hiding, not even from one’s self. The times require us to face any darkness to accomplish union with our full self.
Darth Vader was right about one thing, there is power on the dark side. Dealing with perceived negatives to incorporate their benefits is also known as Shadow Work (see Debbie Ford’s work, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers). My book, Senses of the Soul, uses the tools of Kundalini Yoga to help us safely dive into difficult thoughts and emotions consciously for healing and guidance. This always brings a deeper level of peace and oneness. This is Emotional Balance 2.0: seeking the light without being afraid of the dark.
A student of Senses of the Soul recently said to me: “It dawned on me that I usually use meditate to escape my emotions. But this (SOS work) has a different angle, to acknowledge them and go deep inside to work WITH them. At first I had SO much resistance to facing my fear and anger, but doing so has brought great realization and change.”
Emotional Balance 2.0 is to trust and consciously work with the natural, intuitive wisdom of the sensory system, including the dark, uncomfortable and often disregarded emotions. When we think of Sadness, Depression or Anger as beneath us, we lose the gifts of Love, Renewal and Power they respectively bring. Yogi Bhajan’s use of Anger to awaken and motivate students is well known. When the Dalai Lama was asked if he ever got mad he laughed and said of course, but he also recovers quickly.
Emotions are not un-spiritual; they tell you when something is sending you away from your higher, happy, peaceful self. Conscious use of your heavy emotions and recurring triggers bring helpful gifts and guidance they are meant to give you. More commonly, we misuse emotions in two ways. At one end of the spectrum is Reactivity; feelings take over and we lose control. The opposite of Reaction is Repression, in which we override our true feelings to pretend nothing’s wrong, or worse, disassociate and not even know that we are in distress.
The key to skillful emotional work is the “middle way” between these two. Mindful awareness, neutral observation, meditative-mind-meets-the-emotional-body, and the somatic experience of feelings, all describe this new approach.
What I am saying is, bring emotions into your spiritual practice! How? First, get ready. Emotional activation fires up your limbic system and then your consciousness goes dark. So prepare with some strong pranayama or Kriya. This gives you nervous system strength, personal confidence, and mental clarity to face intimidating feelings.
In meditation the prefrontal cortex lights up, giving you the ability to remain present while fully feeling your emotions. This “peer dialogue” between intellect and emotion produces intuitive responses to resolve whatever is bothering you.
Digging into emotions to regain balance is simple and natural. It is a skill set that can take time to develop. Misinformation and misuse of emotion is the societal norm. But here’s the new standard, set it as a goal for yourself:
When you feel bad,
-You know what you are feeling (Naming the emotion is important to resolving it.)
-You know why you are feeling it. (Identify the real source of your upset.)
-You know how to return to well-being. (What to do or understand to feel better.)
-And, you do that so you can be at your best.
Yogi Bhajan called emotions the senses of the soul. Listen to soul not through words, but through feelings. Get clear and go inside. Explore this last frontier of self-awareness and get your emotional intelligence on!
GuruMeher Singh Khalsa is a professional Life Coach and Kundalini Teacher Trainer. His Kundalini-based work on using heavy emotions for inner guidance is in the KRI approved book Senses of the Soul at www.SensesOfTheSoul.com. In addition to his book, GuruMeher is a certified yoga therapist who offers private sessions by phone in support of your emotional well-being. A fully mentored 9-month training in the Senses of the Soul system begins each February online. For more see:

 https://sensesofthesoul.com/emotion-liberation-courses/

This article, written by GuruMeher, was reprinted from 3HO’s Yogic Living newsletter.
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SOS Success Story: Hannah’s Self-Respect

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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Today I want to share a story with you about one of my students.

Hannah (we’ll call her) came to me with a problem that many parents face.  Her son had always been sweet and kind.  But now, at age 13, he’d become disrespectful and verbally abusive. This made her mad, and she didn’t like how she is angry she was getting right back at him!

Hanna had a big history with anger and outbursts stemming from childhood parental abuse.  She realized that her son was beginning to display the same behavior that she grew up with, and that she and her husband had also long related to each other with angry arguing.

She wanted help managing her anger, but I could tell there was a self-esteem issue stemming from being put down and yelled at as a kid.  How she felt about herself was a deeper issue, which the anger was trying to help by fighting to be respected.

So we went to work using Senses of the Soul. I love seeing the stunning results of using emotions consciously and this was a particularly powerful  example!

I had Hannah close her eyes and breathe deeply until she felt strong and clear.  Then we let Hannah’s anger arise while she maintained her clear self-awareness.  I asked her to ask her anger what it wanted?  She immediately felt the answer, RESPECT!

At this point tears were streaming down her face from both the burning need for respect and the life-long pain of not feeling it.  Bad enough she missed it from her parents, but now her son was joining the disrespect party.  Then, true to the SOS method, I asked her to ask her feelings what she needed.  She heard the answer immediately within herself, “Self-Respect”.

When she came out of the meditation, she explained what she had realized.  She didn’t need to fight with her son, which did not build respect at all.  “I just need to begin by respecting myself.”  Wow, she could give herself what she had been wanting from others! The benefits were obvious and immediate!

I love this story because it says so much about what we are really capable of when we let our emotions help us.  I hope you know and use your emotions whenever you need to.  There are lots of resources at Senses of the Soul.com to help you become more emotionally intelligent, including a full Emotional Liberation course, I hope you’ll join me.   If you are in pain of any kind or are looking for emotional upliftment, I encourage you to check it out.  The link is here and below.

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Psychology Today Sounds Like Senses of the Soul

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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This excerpt is from Happiness? The Upside of Negative Emotions, the cover story in the February 2015 issue of Psychology Today. I can’t believe that what I’ve been working on for the past 20 years is finally hitting the main stream. I’m thrilled that more people will now be thinking about emotions usefully. See below, then read the full article on the Psychology Today website or from the newsstand.

Author Matthew Huston beautifully sets up the premise of Senses of the Soul.  While his knowledge comes from the field of psychology, and I discovered mine through meditation practice and coaching people through troubles, we have come to the same conclusion. So called “negative emotions,” are meant work as your friends! There’s just one place where we differ – how we use that information.

Senses of the Soul is based on EXPERIENCE. This is the next level of therapy and healing and why SOS exercises are so life-changing. We don’t think about these ideas, we practice them. It’s not enough to know that emotions are your friends. Just because I know that vegetables are good for me doesn’t mean I will eat them. I have to FEEL the difference in my health and YOU need to feel the difference with your emotions too.

That’s what Senses of the Soul is all about, and why I get so excited about the upcoming  Emotional Liberation training.  You may know that negative emotions can guide you to positive solutions. I might have told you or you might heard it from someone else. This Psychology Today article will most definitely confirm it for a lot of people. But have you ever experienced using your negative emotions for healing, strength and guidance? Do you know how it’s done? Does it actually feel like your pain will lead you to peace?

Call me a yogi (because I am!), but I think experience is more important that knowledge.

Senses of the Soul combines that emotional therapeutic model with my 15 years as a spiritual counselor and the ancient science of meditation, to take that next step from simply recognizing your emotions as friends, to really feeling that way. That’s why I carefully designed this Emotional Liberation Course that starts in March as an intensive immersion, designed to give you real, consistent practice and experience. You’ll not only know the use of each emotion, you’ll practice the uses of those emotions!

If you’ve been feeling stressed, scared, mad or run down, you need to check out the course and heal your whole life. I sure hope you do! Learn more HERE.
And read this article. The word is getting out, Feelings are your Friends!

Blessings,
GuruMeher

 From Psychology Today, January/February 2015

“Happiness? The Upside of Negative Emotions”

No one questions the value of feeling good. In fact, it seems that for the past 20 years, everyone in America has been on a relentless quest for a blue – sky state of mind, in pursuit of permanent residence on the spectrum between contentment and ecstasy.

Feeling bad is another matter entirely. Emotions that generate unpleasant feelings have been Called sins (wrath, envy), shunned in polite interaction (jealousy, frustration), or identified as unhealthy (sadness, shame). We suppress them, medicate them, and berate ourselves for feeling them.

Because such feelings are aversive, they are often called “negative” emotions, Although “negative” is a misnomer. Emotions are not inherently positive or negative. They are distinguished by much more than whether they feel good or bad. Beneath the surface, every emotion orchestrates a complex suite of changes in motivation, physiology, attention, perception, beliefs, and behaviors: sweating, laughing, desiring revenge, becoming optimistic, summoning specific memories. Each component of every emotion has a critical job to do – whether it’s preparing us to move toward what we want (anger), urging us to improve our standing (envy), or allowing us to undo a social gaffe (embarrassment).

We have the wrong idea about emotions. They’re very rational; Theiy’re means to help us achieve goals important to us, tools carved by eons of human experience that work beyond conscious awareness to direct us where we need to go. They identify trouble or opportunity and suggest methods of repair or gain. They are instruments of survival; in fact, we would have vanished long to go without them…
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Make Good Use of A Mess

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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2015 is off to quite a start! Tragedies and fear continue to increase globally, and for many, personally. How to make sense of this mess? Better yet how to make use of it?

As a life coach I get very hopeful when a client is struggling with a problem they can’t ignore, because I know that growth is ready to happen. Very often my job is to help people leverage a break down into a break through.

Senses of the Soul is based on the principle that pain serves to stimulate awareness and action.
Some examples:

– In Selma, televised violence touched the national consciousness for fairness and voting rights.
– A tragedy in my community brought new love and unity.
– My sickness over the holidays helped me to slow down, rest, review and renew.
– A client was treated so poorly by her lover, she finally walked away, which got his attention and changed everything.
– After years of exhausting Anger and distancing after her father left her, a woman is feeling sad and depressed for the first time (breakdown). This is opening her heart to re-connecting and forgiveness (breakthrough).

When you are down and vulnerable, it can bring you honesty, humility, clarity, and resurrection. We need the ability to more quickly connect what happens to us with its cause – so we can avoid negative consequences – and with its purpose – so we can use everything to learn from. How long will it take us to align the outcome that we want with the actions that we take? This is the evolutionary push in our changing times to bring us intuition.

How can you use this idea in a practical way? Start with the premise that every pain, every trouble, every difficulty, every problem is the universe’s challenge for you to learn grow and improve. So when something is happening that you absolutely do not like or want, ask the following questions:
– How can I use the situation to become stronger, clearer, happier?
– How is this the perfect situation I need right now to grow?
– Looking from the perspective of the purpose of my life,  why did I/ my soul bring on this experience?

These are very difficult and provocative questions that assume total self-responsibility. But they work! The answer may come fast or it may take quite a bit of time to make sense and use of a challenge. Even of a tragedy. But that is the nature of life and of consciousness, to come through it and prevail. You’ve seen that grass growing through the asphalt. That is what got us out of the caves and out of the plagues and will bring us to peace. So keep up and carry on with consciousness in your individual situations. Make use of every mess. And we will all make it!

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Victory Within Tragedy

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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A tragedy feels like defeat. Victory through it, paradoxically, requires some Surrender.

I do live what I teach, mostly. “Allow your awareness to guide you, even the ‘negative’ stuff like apathy or illness. Winter calls us to slow down, so don’t fight it. Surrender until rejuvenation naturally arises. Acceptance! ”

So when I felt a little sad and low here and there these last few weeks, I embraced it and it passed. But hey, now it’s the New Year, back to work, let’s get going. But wait… a tragic death in our community, right on New Year’s? Now I’m laid low and sick? Find myself intimidated by the very tasks I have set for myself this year? None of this was in my neat plan. Can I accept, as I ask others to do?

And what are my problems compared to my friend stuck in the hospital for months after a stroke, or my dharma-sister who just cremated her 25 year-old newlywed husband? Our tests to surrender and embrace where we’re at, who we are and what is happening come in all sizes.

There’s no comparing with others; we are all challenged to keep up under the events life brings us and be victorious. Victory is an attitude that includes acceptance, because Victory is seldom what we imagined.

When others prevail in difficulty, it strengthens us to do the same. I invite you to be inspired here by this young woman’s courage, speaking at her husband’s funeral. Move the time slider to 3:03:30 when Ad Purkh speaks of her husband Hari Simran. The young man’s parents speak before her. I hope you will be uplifted as I was by sharing this intimate moment, and feel the strength of spirit and the support of community! (If you are new to this story, he fell and died while hiking in Mexico on 12/30/14.)
As she said, “Don’t be afraid to cry, because he wasn’t afraid of anything.”

As I listen to his parents, friends of mine who raised their son with spiritual principles and practices, I am struck by the caliber of human being they created by those teachings. AND, how with those same teachings and with the support of spiritual community, they have molded their own consciousness to accept this tragedy and prevail in their elevation.

Bless yourself with strength and victory. We are in this human experience together. We can do this, whatever it is! Accept and Prevail!
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End Suffering – No More ‘no knows”

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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Make This Your Year of No “No know”

Aren’t you sick and tired of the suffering?  Your own, that of others, global human suffering!  Pain comes with having a body, but suffering – that long-term stuck-in-misery mental/ emotional torture we endure out of habit – is optional.  Enough is enough!

Let’s raise our standard of happiness, quit tolerating our patterns of self-created and avoidable drama!  There is a way through every block, right? So why do we live in stress, create and then tolerate troubles, and continue our patterns and pain-sustaining habits?

Buddha said suffering is caused by ignorance. What I’ve seen is that we stay stuck due to 3 forms of not knowing. You either:

●     don’t know that you’re suffering.  (you just get used to it)

●     don’t know it can be better. (lack of good models, settling for as it is)

●     don’t know how to break through.  (lack of guidance, quit trying)

The wise ones have always said that our answers are within us; that we do know! Yogi Bhajan challenged us to eliminate our use of the phrase, “I don’t know,” altogether because it’s just not true and is an excuse to quit penetrating the issue. As an exercise, simply try saying something that is more true and accurate than “I don’t know”.

Senses of the Soul offers powerful access to our vast inner-knowing by the use of difficult feelings to KNOW the real source of our problems and solutions to our suffering. The evidence that I’ve seen for this, the results of thousands of people using SOS techniques, gives me huge hope for what is incorrectly called the human condition.

But now that I see how simple it is to diminish troubles and increase joy, I feel greater sadness for the pain I see people living in.  I’m fired up, impatient and eager to raise expectations and standards for our quality of life.  My contribution to this is to teach Senses of the Soul and the tools of Kundalini Yoga that facilitate access to the strength and clarity needed to consciously confront challenges.

Do you know the simple principles of Senses of the Soul? Do you use them?

Here are 3 keys:

1.     “Bad” emotions are good things, friends, allies.

2.     Their Pain leads to Peace when used skillfully.

3.      The SOS Method is:

a.      get as clear and strong as possible. (This is where yoga helps)

b.      listen to emotions by feeling them, consciously. (Neutral mindfulness is essential)

c.       control by allowing emotions to tell you what you need. (Inner honesty, conscious soul-searching)

Don’t let emotions cause you problems.  Their pain is not the problem.  Your problems are not even your problem!  It’s your poor response, or lack of response to them that causes suffering. Using feelings as guides to handle life’s challenges is simple and natural.  It just takes some re-training of bad habits.  When used as intended it’s like this…

Just imagine that whenever you feel bad, less than happy:

1.       you always know it (you don’t just live with it), and know exactly what you are feeling.

2.       you clearly know why you’re feeling bad.

3.       you easily see what you need in order to feel better again.

4.       you do that, and return quickly to feeling safe, happy, and loved.

No more NOT KNOWING how to use emotions.  The information is here.  Let these discoveries sink in and change your paradigm of feelings.  Don’t believe it; prove it!  Learn and practice.

Next we’ll look at  “Knowing but not doing”; when we don’t use what we know, to grow.

Let me hear more from you about this.  What do you need to end your suffering in 2015?  Join the conversation at facebook.com/emotionsos, and let’s get fired up to feel better, together.

Feel Better!
– GuruMeher

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Zombies at the Gate – Stop Attacks Before They Eat You Up

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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Select What Affects You

Your heart is a sacred thing enshrined in your miraculous body. Dignity and Divinity are built into every cell of your being and realm of your psyche. But so often we feel small, defective, dirty, mean or lonely.

You are a precious treasure. But like fine china your value can be unnoticed, undervalued, mistreated, even shattered. Valuables, gold and gems are safeguarded, insured and protected. And so must each of us see the immense value and the great sensitivity of the self and defend our sensibilities from all careless or calculated attacks.

You have the power and choice to accept or reject incoming communications BEFORE you let them hit your heart. Some people have a “tough skin” and are less affected by negativity, but most of us will enjoy life more when we increase this ability to discern. And BTW, some of these attacks come from within your own mind!

Said more simply: Hurtful stuff comes at you every day. Learn to protect, and select what affects you!

Here’s a way to develop this habit. Each step may take training and practice.

1- When an attack is coming, or has come at you from your own mind or from someone/ something outside yourself;

2- Decide not to hear it, accept it, believe it, nor let it inside you yet. Don’t take it on.

3- Get yourself as strong and clear as possible. Learn to do this!

4- When YOU are ready, allow the thought/ words/ situation to come right up to you but not in, like a stranger at the door you are going to question before they qualify to enter with your permission.

5- Clearly, meditatively, from a place of as much neutrality as you can embody, decide that you are ready to examine the information. This shifts the power from the attacker to you. You CHOOSE to hear it now.

6- From neutrality you can assess the input (still from outside the door of your being!).

7- Ask, “What part of this is not about me but all about them and where they are in pain and confusion. You can learn to easily see what is not true for you. Just let this go. Release and discard it, drop it. Say out loud, like Gandolf, “You shall not pass!” The words may not enter nor stick with you. It may be 100% not about you, but then Ask:

8- “Is there any part of this message that I deem to have some truth, some valid information with which I can correct  or improve myself, learn and grow from?”

9- If and when YOU see that there is something of use in this communication, some Truth, then as an empowered and empowering act, you let it in the door of your heart. Consider it deeply and let it contribute to your consciousness. Use it, with gratitude to make your life even better.

10- And use this same practice with your own thoughts when they attack from within! Try it!

This Truth portion of any incoming attack may be anywhere from 0% to 100% of the original message. And only you know. You are the judge of Truth, and you are the protector of your honor. But it does take that elevated neutral view to see clearly. That is the thing most of us need to practice and strengthen.  Meditate to get there!
In time this becomes nearly automatic. You are safe and free, the decider about what you take in and how you use the mostly random and impersonal stuff that may get thrown in your direction each day.  And, you are open to input, flexible and constantly learning.

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Analysis Paralysis

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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Does it ever happen to you? You are trying to decide something, figure out what happened, understand what you think, feel, or should do. There is a LOT on your mind. It distracts you, keeps you lying awake. Thoughts are churning, you can’t NOT think about it. You debate the same pro’s and con’s over and over without getting anywhere new. Meanwhile, nothing changes. You are stuck. You have a mild, medium or intense case of ANALYSIS PARALYSIS.

As powerful as the human mind is, we have another faculty for knowing things. It is less well-defined and, unfortunately, not very well trusted and utilized. It is still considered lame, bogus, even mystical. Our language is imprecise; we describe it as a gut feeling, following our heart, a hunch, “I don’t know how I know, I just know”, and (correctly) intuition. It is a key part of our total “sensory system”. And it’s time we quit suffering and live with the full benefits of this way of knowing truths directly from our own soul.

“Listening to soul” is nothing magical: Soul is simply the part of you that sees the big picture. And listening to it is extremely practical. The mind can compute a million details (content), while the heart can take in the entire situation (context) and “get it” in one impulse, without thinking at all.

The things that matter most to you are more easily known to the heart’s subtle, calm, “still, small voice”. Just as a parent can patiently listen to a child ranting in a tantrum, your higher awareness can calmly observe the frantic chatter of the monkey-like mind. Are you familiar with these two voices inside of you? Wouldn’t it be nice to reside in the clear and calm one?

Here are some concepts and practices to make the switch:

– When something is troubling, bothering, overwhelming, confusing…

– Don’t go after it, attack it, get wound up tight. Your first priority is to get clear.  When you do act, it will be from there.

– Instead, de-escalate. Calm your nervous system and relax the mind.

I hope you know at this point in your life what works fast and best for you to do this. Yoga and Kundalini meditations are the most effective methods I’ve found, but there as many ways as there are minds.

– When you get a bit of space in there, ask your mind to wait for further instruction. Reassure it that everything is okay; to sit and wait like a faithful dog until you give it the next “ball to chase”. Train your mind!

This might take minutes, days, or years! You may not trust at first that this is the most efficient way to “fix the problem” since we are trained to go after the symptom at the surface.

In yogic terms we say, be sure to listen BOTH to the negative and the positive sides (thoughts), but get to neutral before you speak or act. You can almost always buy some time, postpone a response until you are crystal clear, until you know you are acting in your best, long-term interest.

Folks ask me, “How do I know that I am hearing from the Soul and not the Mind?” I say, “Practice!” Practice what? When you see, hear, feel or sense and get the truth, it is totally, instantly clear, just like that light bulb in the cartoons. It is deeper, in your body, and surer than a thought. You feel certain, at peace, and at least momentarily willing to stand against all odds to pursue more of that same sensation.

So in a beautiful irony, the remedy for Analysis Paralysis is to not think. Rather, to solve the situation from your heart. Once you know what must be, throw the ball for that energetic dog. Say, “okay mind here’s the deal; go get it.” When you feel so much better, and also see that things work out better, you’ll learn to trust your Self.

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Triage Your Challenges

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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“Don’t go outside yourself and become a victim, go inside and become a master.”

– Yogi Bhajan

We are fragile when we are born and can’t survive without getting food and care from “out there”. As we grow we seek our countless needs from the environment. So naturally, when someone or something bothers us, we “go after” the thing to “fix it.”  It’s a costly mistake we all make.

Shi* Happens. That great piece of modern wisdom reminds us that after we’ve done all we can to take care of ourselves, life often brings the unexpected and unwanted. When it does, don’t react or attack. Don’t take it any more personally than the weather. People act according to their nature and gravity moves stars in their own orbit. It’s not about you. But when it interacts with you, it does affect you. Focus on the effect it is having on YOU.

They didn’t do it “to” you. They were just being themselves. How it impacts you is all about you. And that is something you have more control over. Rather than fight the nature of things, focus FIRST on yourself. What’s really going on? How did this affect me? Why does it bother me? What do I need now? What could I do to make it right for myself, to move on happily?

Our feelings are critical equipment to help in this first step. The self-awareness inquiry is simple. Get as clear and neutral as you can, then ask:

-What am I feeling?

-Why am I feeling this way?

-What do I need to know or do to feel better?

With practice, you can do this quickly and accurately. THEN go “out there” when action is needed, to communicate, rearrange things, to handle it based on your clear desired outcome. This is conscious self-care. It is looking-before-you-leap. It reflects taking full responsibility for your own experience. Though the world won’t always conform and obey your wishes, there is ALWAYS something you can do in any situation to make it better for yourself. There is always a choice. And choice gives you power.

For huge, difficult, life-changing events there are seldom quick fixes. Getting clear can take years. You can be sure that this level of life-challenge is bringing you a major demand to learn, grow and to expand your consciousness. When you approach life from the vast perspective of the soul, you can ask, “Why did I invite this into my life? What will be its value to me long term? What do I not know now, the knowing of which will take me through the block?

These are confronting questions that leave no room for blame or helpless acceptance of fate. At first intimidating but ultimately empowering, this approach trains us to use our ability to create our reality.  Let’s keep learning from each challenge by looking at ourselves first for the pain, the cause and the remedy.

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 EMOTIONAL WORKOUTS

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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Physical Fitness.  Everyone knows what that is and how important it is to achieve it.  Some take steps to get in shape; others decide that it’s not worth the effort.  But all people recognize the importance of keeping the physical body healthy.

This is because in the 1960’s, President Kennedy implemented programs in school for physical education.  It’s so practiced and understood at the national level and beyond because there was a federal mandate to get people aware about the health of their bodies.

But what about Emotional Wellness?  We know some things about Emotions.  We know that exercise can reduce stress – for instance.  But for the most part, we are still in an infancy of awareness when it comes to Emotional Wellness.

Mostly, there’s a lot unspoken pain in people’s lives.  Additionally, there isn’t adequate treatment.

We take care of anxiety and depression with pharmaceutical drugs.  We take care of drug abuse with cold, institutional rehab centers that have high relapse rates.  We take care of relationship problems with court ordered separations and divorces.

None of these are healthy treatments and they don’t come close to addressing prevention.   Emotional literacy is the next big thing we need.

We need to see that Emotions are our friends.  And while we many need to heal them, we don’t need to treat them.  We need to utilize them for understanding and empowerment.  We need to have healthy relationships with our Emotions, so they can guide and support us.  If we start relating to emotions in this way,we will all be a lot happier! I really believe this crucial skill can make the world a better place!

To achieve this goal, we can follow the curve of Physical Education, and implement similar strategies in promoting Emotional Education.

  1. See that there is a need for emotional education and research methods for children and adults.
  2. Encourage commitment and investment of time.   Just like you don’t start running a marathon after one day at the gym, emotional dexterity takes time and effort.
  3. Create clear exercises for Emotional Literacy and develop systems that accelerate growth in this area

I hope that one day, these programs are achieved in school, so that kids grow up knowing how to handle emotions for their betterment and success.  In the meantime, this is why I developed Senses of the Soul.

Senses of the Soul (SOS) is a system of self-therapy that uses Emotions for Strength, Healing and Guidance.  It’s a transformative technique that really changes the way you live your life! If you really want to improve your life, there is no better way to start.

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Embracing the Sacred Self

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 4, 2016 
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There is a lot of suffering out there, as well as within our own hearts and minds. But there’s reason for hope.  After five decades of searching, learning, and experiencing anything I could find that might help my happiness, I can say that what made the most difference was to calm down enough to pay attention, to talk nicely to myself and find out what was wrong.

I remember taking on the “project” of Self-Love. It sounded like a good idea. I thought it would be simple and would come automatically. But I found it surprisingly difficult, so I decided to start with an easier step: self-niceness.  As that left me in a world that treated me better, something deep inside me accepted that I must be worth it genuine.  The positive momentum continued from self-kindness to self-compassion and on into Self-Love. It took a long time and a lot of work, acceptance, and surrender. But it was worth every last drop of blood, sweat, and tears.

Sacred Self-Hug

Here is a simple thing to do as a daily practice or anytime you need it.

Sit calmly and take a few deep breaths. Cross your arms with your hands holding opposite shoulders; left arm higher and right arm below it. As the hands hold on, relax the rest of your body-your face, neck, shoulders, and arms. The body language is a self-hug. If you have ever loved anything, you know the feeling of a hug; call it forth now. Feel cozy and loved within yourself. Breathe long, full breaths that slowly become effortless as you settle in to the hug. Have some gentle uplifting music playing softly, if you wish. Think any positive thought and image and evoke every warm feeling. Let everything else disappear until there is no thought at all, just the feeling that you are safe and loved. Let that melt you away until what is left is beyond feeling. All is well, all is perfect. Behold this awe and reverence for the vastness. Be in pure experience. It is Divine, sacred, pure consciousness.

At some point you will be ready to “come back.” Breathe deeply, stretch, and relax. Can you invite this experience to influence and alter your activity? When you visit it often, it will not be forgotten.

A quote that really embodies this feeling is something my son said at his high school graduation: “I am exactly who I am supposed to be, and that is who I’ve always wanted to be, and I am completely in love with that person” – Har Narayan Khalsa, June 2012.

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Solve Your Problems

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 2, 2016 
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The time has come to solve your problems. We all have the ability to do so, yet we live with too many. In just a few short years we have put all the information that humans have gathered onto one web that is accessible to everyone. But until knowledge is used wisely it does nothing to increase human happiness. For that we need more than information and knowledge, we need wisdom. Not just answers, but the right solutions for each situation, which are then put into action.

You can’t fix the world, but you can fix your life to make it work well, so that you love it.  You can do that, and you must. One bit at a time. You are a self-contained unit. Yes you have your history, faults and issues, but you also come with the resources to discover and handle everything life brings.
The internet has shown what the sages have always known. We can tap into all knowledge. But to solve your problems the answers are not out there somewhere. Your answers are already within you.Throughout history most cultures, and certainly those that wrote history, were autocratic. Someone held the power, knew the answers and might give them to you if you paid the price.  We still each begin our life depending on the power of others, whether they have our best interest in mind or not. Times are changing, first to grant individual autonomy and then to demand it. Autocracy once meant the power of one over all; the new autocracy is your complete power over your own life. IF you have that, wouldn’t your life be awesome by now? How do you know where to start?
For the things that matter most to you, matters of the heart, what will give your life purpose, meaning and fulfillment no one knows better than you and you’re the only one that can answer these questions. So the future of health is self-help. The future of therapy is self-therapy, and the source of all this wisdom is built inside of you just waiting to be heard. Once you gain access to this “Innernet” you will begin to correct everything in your life today that isn’t working for you, clear the past things that have harmed you, make peace with your future – even your death – and enjoy lifetime ability to handle yourself.
Continued next week: 
“The Innernet – Your Source for Solutions”
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Sensitivity is a Strength

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 2, 2016 
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Last weeks’ article “Make a Space to be Fragile” generated many responses which I was very happy to receive. A lot of gratitude was expressed for the permission or validation and support, and I would say almost a hunger for the time and place in our lives to be soft. Most came from women, but I was especially happy to hear from some men. One of which, I have his permission to share with you below.
We are seeing the trend that the human population is becoming more sensitive. It’s an evolutionary increase in our level of awareness with the result that people are both more easily hurt and more intensely reactive to each other. We feel more, we know more, and it can be very overwhelming. It is in part an adaptive response to the intensity of information and change.
This sensitivity is not a weakness. More like a gift, a skill that we must learn to master. The first up is to recognize the ability to sense more deeply and clearly stimulation from inside and outside of yourself, and to see this happening with other people as well. Then to accept and begin to manage the information to your advantage rather than resist, judge it or let it crush you.
You will need rest and physical strength, strong nervous and glandular system just to handle the voltage. For this I recommend Kundalini yoga and the entire yogic lifestyle. And create the time and space, that safe space to be fragile so you can work with and process what you are feeling.
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Find a Space to be Fragile

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 2, 2016 
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These thoughts continue the theme of valuing and embracing the power of becoming softer. We looked at creating space for satisfaction and contentment in this ambitious world. Just like fish which may not distinguish water because it is all that they know, I don’t think we realize the extent to which we live in a very aggressive survival-of-the fittest world.There is tenderness to be found but it’s not what gets you to the top, what makes winners, right? The world wouldn’t exist without the dual power of the feminine, but it is certainly has been marginalized and under utilized.
So I was deeply touched by an interview on NPR of a female singing duo named My Bubba. The artists speak so softly about the need for us to have a space in our life to be fragile and silent. Their tender speaking voices and sweet  music embody the truth of their message better than I can describe.(link below).

So many of us face constant incredible pressure of our job: deadlines, put-downs, demands, competition and fear of all kinds of threats and aggression. For many there’s no relief at home where stress is high, overwhelm is the rule. There is no safe harbor in what ought to be a safe sanctuary. Too often our closest connections are the most painful.

Kindness, understanding, love, support, tenderness and the ability to relax and feel safe, both alone and with others are very real human needs. We are incredibly resilient to stress, but we also do have a very fragile side physically and psychologically. Think of it not as weakness but rather that there is part of you that’s more like fine china, beautiful and deserving of care.  Like a snowflake, timelessly perfect while easily ruined. Or like one of those Tibetan sand mandalas, exquisitely sacred but easily blown away. Like you, these deserve to be valued, honored, treasured and cherished, not carelessly or cruelly neglected.

Do you have places in which you are treated like that? Enough time for it? People who give you that? I hope so. If not, you can create it now. It’s important to train others to treat you well but it all starts with you. Self-value, self-respect, self care.

Please, please, please find the conditions you need to feel safe and relaxed enough to unwind and un-hide your soft and gentle side. Suggestion: wake up early in the morning when it’s still dark, or perhaps you find early evening or late night most peaceful. Sit in a sweet space and meditate with yourself. Create that inner space where you can be fragile, feel your heart, talk tenderly to your soul, and feel the love. Do this often and see how very strong you become!
Listen to the seven minute My Bubba interview here. Her “beautiful space to be fragile “comment comes toward the end.
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Getting Life Juuust Right – Your Sweet Spot

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· April 20, 2016 
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We are all a lot like Goldilocks. We sample to discover what we like by experiencing a lot of what we DON’T like. We learn compassion by being hurt and by hurting. We (hopefully) come to moderation by experimenting with excess or scarcity. Life is a comparative study in which getting it wrong is as important to our progress as getting it right. We explore between extremes to find our sweet spot.
This can be intentional, but is more often more like stumbling around bumping into people and things rather randomly. So right now, today, you find yourself in a mixture of situations. Some are too passionate and involve things getting broken, like Goldilocks’ porridge and chair. Or you learn how it is to go cold and passive, withdraw, and allow mistreatment. We have enough days and experiences in a lifetime to try EVERYTHING.
But most of us specialize; we get stuck in one extreme for a long time rather than moving on toward a more suitable equilibrium. Some remain habitual givers and become exhausted and resentful. Others make a permanent niche as takers, demanding and ungrateful which leaves them empty and lonely. Any imbalance will cause a fall.  THE GIFT OF EVERY BAD EXPERIENCE IS TO MOTIVATE YOU TO FIND A BETTER ONE.
SO DON’T GET STUCK. When you feel bad, let that open your awareness to what is not working. Is the problem about too much or too little of a thing? Too fast, busy and overwhelmed? Slow down, take time, and make space to live. Stuck, sad, bored, unmotivated? How can you bring their opposites: heat, stimulation, energy, spirit? See for yourself that behind each problem are some excesses or shortages. Food, sleep, time, skills, ego, love… Once you ID the resource, look to both external and inner means to increase/ decrease it. When balanced, the problem will begin to resolve.
That shift to center may feel foreign, extreme, uncomfortable, risky and even impossible from where you have been operating. Don’t run back to safe but ineffective ways. Try this stretch into new thinking and behavioral territory awhile and compare how it works. Don’t give up too soon in the early “getting used to it” stage, which can be clumsy and uncertain. Software upgrades take some time to get used to, but worth it to have a better operating system.
Every life, great or small, has it’s own Sweet Spot.
Use the nature of polarities:  Too Hot – Too Cold – Juuust Right …
to find the life you love.
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Seeking Stimulation? Try the Sublime Kind

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· March 24, 2016 
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Emocionante in Spanish translates into English as “exciting.” Just count the ways, from morning coffee to evening news, that you seek stimulation. Like any addiction, ever-greater doses are needed to reach the same high and to block out all pain, but the damage also increases. In this love/hate relationship with feelings, “ups” are followed by and matched with “downs;” you fatigue from both, and pain persists.

But there is a higher octave of pleasure that is subtler and more sustaining. The experiences at this higher level are considered spiritual goals: Peace, Joy, Bliss, Unconditional Love. These are boring when compared with action movies and family fights, but they become more appealing as we detox from living in constant motion and commotion. These subtler excitements become more enticing as we refine our sensitivity; these sublime feelings are experiences that we all deeply long for once the noise and chaos recede.

Just as your five senses help you attend to the body, emotions are a way to relate to your soul. They tell you what your heart longs for, and they convey pain when you don’t get it. They bring fierce energy when your peace is disturbed so that you can protect your sanctity.

All the big yet invisible experiences that determine your quality of life—Love, Peace, Contentment, Beauty, Grandeur, Hope, Inspiration—are felt inside. These inner experiences are known through the same sensory system that brings you Anxiety and Hate. “Negative” emotions are, in fact, warning signals pointing to whatever it is that is interfering with your preferred “positive” states.

Emotions are the Senses of the Soul. They lead you to light. They let you know where you are on your path from pain-to-peace, alerting you away from suffering and toward deep and sustainable pleasure.

As you begin to use emotions to clear up trouble rather than cause it, you will spend more time feeling good and happy. This will become your new normal, and inner peace will become your natural home.                                             

from Senses of the Soul

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Resilience and Energy Management, Part 2: Learning to Let Go

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· March 16, 2016 
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Last week we looked at the inflow and outflow of energy in our lives, which the yogis call Prana and Apana. (Click here to read it.) Since our mental, emotional and physical health depend on managing our energy to have the right amount needed, I suggested reviewing your use of this most essential resource. Again, take some time to clear away situations that are unnecessarily draining you.

Another way to prevent fatigue and despair and restore vitality is to work better with the out-flowing Apana. We naturally prefer the influx of energy. We mostly want more! Time, energy, enthusiasm, activity and achievement. Our busyness is very exciting. But try holding your breath for over a minute and see how much you come to value letting go of that breath. So instead of just thinking of Apana as elimination or losing something, think of it as a letting go, resting, relaxing, not having to do anything; just being. You can’t have more of anything if there is no space for it to fit into. Everything you want needs room.

Just as much is we get attached to gaining not losing, we fear the dark, the void, emptiness, nothingness, the unknown, death. Yet, we know how wonderful it is to exhale and to fall asleep. Both make way for a revival, for the inrushing of new life. Evaluate for yourself how common valued, and practiced these space creating practices are, in proportion to all of your “go, gain and get” activities.

Silence

All the sleep you want

Frequent vacations

Naps

No plans

Quiet time

A still mind

Letting others win/ be right

Only one thing on your to do list and it is your favorite thing in the world

Closets, drawers and garages with lots of empty space

A humble ego

Contentment

Patience

World peace

All of these things are examples of the beauty of emptiness and nothingness. So don’t be afraid of your own outflow; it keeps the Universe in balance and you happy. Increase your Apana activities: rest up rather than pushing when you want more energy and want to feel more optimistic. Create some space and allow nature to fill you up.

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Bouncing Back: Resilience and Energy Management

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· March 9, 2016 
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Are you rising or falling, upbeat or downtrodden, enthused or burnt out? Fierce winds blow, followed by calm. But we seem to just push on and on. When we feel depleted physically, mentally and creatively, get sick or depressed, we think something is wrong. Often it is the wisdom of our system creating a balance when we don’t know how. The ability to rise and recover – from anything – is called Resilience and it is woven into every life. But we do have a choice to ignore, resist, or work with nature’s rejuvenating way.

We were all born with an energy “trust fund”, a personal store of life force that is used and replenished like interest earned. Some people have more and some less as a baseline. But learning to be good stewards or energy managers of this precious gift of “prana” is each living being’s privilege and responsibility. Each day you have a certain amount of incoming energy available. Yogis understand this as Prana. As it is spent, it leaves you. This is Apana.

A breath comes in to give your cells life, then the breath carries away the by products of metabolism that you don’t need; exhaust fumes. THAT ONE BREATH IS USED AND GONE! What did you buy with it; did you gain or lose from the trade? You got a few seconds of living. At the end of the day you are tired. You sleep and your energy bank account is refilled. What did you get back from your day’s efforts? Over many decades there is a collective depletion we call aging. The “bank account” of physical energy is not longer replenished as fully as before. Net loss? Not necessarily!

Consider that air, food, water, sunlight all bring you prana, but so do environments, people, attitudes, thoughts and emotions. Prana is subtler than electricity and calories; it spans the non-physical worlds; it is vibrational. If you are spending your energy to increase peace and beauty around you, wisdom and mental fortitude within, neutrality and emotional resilience as a habit… this is a good trade! Like good financial planning, wise energy management can afford you a growing body of all the happiness you need. The first step is to review how you are spending your life force. What are you investing in? What are you getting in return?

Examples of poor investments that deplete you:

Spending time with people that bring you down.

All work and no play.

Blaming and complaining without working to resolve problems.

Allowing yourself to be mistreated.

Negative self-talk.

Worry, doubt, confusion, despair and depression, unresolved anger.

Thoughts and feelings can gain or lose LOTS of life force. But remember these “Senses of the Soul” can also be used to guide you out of trouble; that is their purpose! Allowing these energy drains to go unresolved is the source of greatest exhaustion for modern people. When you live close to the “edge”, it is like bankruptcy, struggle and suffering. Time for an energy-management makeover?

Take a year to clean up, retrain or change the environments, relationships, personal habits and behaviors that drain you, stress you, don’t uplift you. Just make a list of the all that bothers you. Then, a list of fanciful ideas; what you can do to stop the energy bleeding and switch over to healthy feeding off good vibes.

More on managing your Prana and Apana for resilience next week….

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Emotional Contagion – Choose Your Moods

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· March 1, 2016 
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emotional contagion. noun. the tendency to feel and express emotions similar to and influenced by those of others; also, the phenomenon of one person’s negative thoughts or anxiety affecting another’s mood. It is less conscious and more automatic, while there are also the more cognitive, sophisticated, and “socially beneficial” processes of empathy and sympathy.

It’s the idea that we really can and do “catch” emotions from the people around us; their emotions will actually rub off on you. (See the paper on Emotional Contagion by Elaine Hatfield et. als. http://www.elainehatfield.com/ch50.pdf)
As social creatures it is essential to feel and bond with others. Problem is when they bring you down. And that started early, at home, when your family set your emotional “thermostat”. Were you instilled with the habits of Anxiety? Anger? Sadness and Depression? Shame and low Self Esteem? Once you spend a lot of time in these emotional vibratory patterns, you are easily triggered to return there again and again by people around you. It can seem that you are helpless and trapped by the troubled emotions of others.
Solutions? Awareness! Observe and discover:
– Know your “go to” emotional states. I facetiously call them our “favorite emotions” because we spend a lot of time with them.
– Then notice the influences that bring you into and back out of them. When, with whom, where and why you find yourself with those feelings?
– Equally important is to identify the preferred “positive” emotional states you have and would like to dwell in.
– List and find the people, places and activities that “trigger” you into these states, and hang out there! If that sounds simple, it is! By choosing your friends, environments, actions and thoughts that help you feel good, in this way you can “choose your mood”. It may take time to change habits, not to mention a job, but the improvement will follow incrementally with your choices.
Kundalini Yoga is the single most effective mood-changer that I have ever found. The teacher, the classroom, music, lighting all have an uplifting effect. Then the exercises change your vibration, allowing you to release negativity (sometimes by feeling it in the exercise), and access very positive feelings that simply come to you. In time you find that these “higher vibrations” are truly your natural defaults. (May take time to get there, but you can!)
The next step is to become a teacher. In this context I mean a person who, while able to feel and merge with others, is not pulled into negativity, despair or any other vibratory frequency unwillingly. Rather, you are able to hold and share a positive feeling that uplifts, or “raises the vibration” of the other person. Simply said, people feel better by being around you.
So Emotional Contagion is real, but you can learn to choose how you want to feel.
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Principles of Happiness

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· February 17, 2016 
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Hi folks,

How’s your happiness going? I want to share some thoughts and tools on the subject. I spend my life helping others to find more of it through the tools that I have acquired: Kundalini yoga, life coaching and working with the emotions. And ultimately those came to me for selfish reasons; they are the product of my own search for happiness. So when I was thinking of the story of the many people I have helped from which to draw some examples and conclusions, I realize that there’s no one I know more about in their search for happiness than myself. And I am very, very happy.

In the review of my process I realize that it has been a project and continues to be a process. So I want to share a list of principles and practices, all of which are important and any of which will help. As you look through them you will be naturally drawn to some as most needed and effective for you right now. Please do read the final few points in summation.

PRINCIPLES OF HAPPINESS

  • Believe that it is possible, no matter the circumstances nor the past.
  • Commit to the pursuit of it. Be steady, it takes work.
  • Be patient, it takes time.
  • Have courage, to face and deal with obstacles.
  • Be flexible, happiness may not be what you think.
  • Be smart, figure out what you need, what makes you happy.
  • Make good choices. Every day you make hundreds of micro choices that lead you closer or further to your happiness.
  • Be adaptable, the sources and nature of your happiness changes with time.
  • Acceptance, work with what you have right now to create happiness.
  • Let go, end attachments in situations that bring you down.
  • Take care of yourself, health and energy help a lot.
  • Start where you are, there’s nothing so wrong or bad that you can’t make incremental improvements.
  • It’s not an all or nothing game, it’s about making steady gains.
  • Don’t compare and compete in the happiness game. Be inspired by what you see but don’t be fooled into thinking that anyone has a better chance at happiness than you.
  • Hardships are obstacles but not obstructions, they can serve to motivate and help you find happiness.
  • Happiness is served by temporary enjoyments but it is much deeper and more substantial, more like a healthy diet then a single dessert. It includes body mind and emotions, but is impossible without a deep spiritual component. Giving it is an essential part of getting it.
  • It is your birthright. Only you can do it. But get help and support. Humans need connection.
  • Get started, keep going. It’s a continual process that can increase in up times and down.

 

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What to do About Super Sensitivity

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· January 25, 2016 
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Feel Your Soul

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· January 22, 2016 
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How do you know you have a Soul? We’re done with the days when someone tells you and you just believe it, or don’t believe. That’s just not satisfying anymore. This is the age of knowledge which comes by your own direct experience. But you can’t see Soul, and “seeing is believing,” right? Well, you can’t see love either; how do you know it exists? You can feel it! Feelings are a subtler sense, part of your sixth sense. When used consciously, our Emotions are the Senses of the Soul.

You use your five physical senses to go get what you need and avoid harm.  Emotional feelings are also sensors. They bring subtler information, the “flavor” of a situation. I may see you smiling at me, but how do you really “feel” about me?  Something tells me that you are actually very upset with me. That information is more important to our relationship than what my eyes tell me. But most of us don’t have trust and skill in using our emotions intuitively. We often ignore and override this vital source of guidance. Or, we become slave to our feelings without mindful interpretation of their messages.

You can use all your emotions – the pleasant and the painful ones — to feel your depths and heights. When you want to listen to your soul – always a good thing to do – feelings help you understand it. They are part of the intimate, intuitive language of the soul. Sadness, despair and fear can put you in touch with your heart and soul just as much as joy and bliss.

The benefit that all emotions share is that they can get you focused on your body and your immediate “felt experience” rather than only listening to the mind. When focusing well on emotions, one is in the present – where you need to be to deal with life- rather than in the world of past and future that your mind escapes to.  Feelings get us listening and learning not from mind, which can only remember, imagine and believe. They take us into direct experience of the here and now which is where intuition lives.
Of course we prefer to feel good and don’t like those “bad” feelings, but they all lead to Soul. A Sikh master wrote, “pain is the remedy.” How so? Pain humbles us, opens our hearts and motivates change. It brings the surrender necessary to help you find new solutions. Pain makes you pay attention! When you listen to your emotions in a mindful and meditative way, when you approach them consciously — not as a slave nor as a controlling suppressor but as a partner – you are indeed listening to the wisdom of your Soul. Soul knows exactly what’s interrupting your flow of happiness and what you need to do to restore it.

What does Soul feel like? It varies from person to person and time to time, but it always includes clarity and vastness. That opening comes sometimes from highs, sometimes from lows. Emotions can be just as chaotic and confusing as thoughts, so most of us need some training to be their partner instead of their slave. Learn to consciously work with your feelings to FEEL YOUR SOUL.  This is the mission of Senses of the Soul. It’s simple to learn, and I am happy to send you “The SOS Method” and a short video series to learn it. Just email me at gurumeher@SensesOfTheSoul.com.

If you are ready to truly master your emotions…

Each year, I work with a small group of people to thoroughly train them in the use of emotions for healing, personal growth, spiritual transformation and self-mastery. That full training, Emotional Liberation, is starting now! This is advanced self-therapy. A proven structure to work through issues, heal traumas and make long-awaited changes. Self study, personal coaching and group support in weekly calls create a safe place to gain a lifetime skillset for emotional wellbeing. You are warmly invited to find out more about this method, the book and the upcoming course, Emotional Liberation, at www.SensesoftheSoul.com.

“I entered this course with high expectations. I was surprised when the first thing I learned was that I don’t really work with my feelings. I do a lot of self-help courses and do all the work from my head in a way that actually make me feel worse about myself because I’m not what I’m supposed to be. But this work let me feel whatever I was feeling, and from that I could heal. It is a lifetime of work that I now have the tools to do.

It’s been amazing all the things that I’ve learned in nine months. I’ve learned to surrender to what I’m actually feeling and what is happening to me without beating myself up. I have so much more self-love and ability to take care of myself than I had before. I want to thank everyone in the class for supporting my process through this year of listening, sharing and support. It was a very important part of the process for me, to know that I’m not crazy and other people are dealing with the same things.” – Kerri

The following article has been reprinted courtesy of:
Copyright Siri-Gian Kaur Khalsa, Soul Answer, Inc., 2015
www.SoulAnswer.com/wisdom_marketplace.html & www.SoulAnswer.org/good-reads
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Be Happier This Year, One Feeling at a Time

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· January 13, 2016 
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Today’s SOS thoughts come from Lisa! She is my assistant, protégé, and the person one person who understands, practices and teaches this emotional guidance work better than anyone. You have seen her on some videos, and will be seeing more of her around Senses of the Soul, especially at the Live LA event weekends, coming soon.

Be Happier This Year, One Feeling at a Time

How much of your time is spent being happy? And how much time do you spend feeling bad? Seeking pleasure and avoiding pain drive us, and happiness is something we all seek. But look at how much suffering there is. Why aren’t we better at solving this by now? No one has solved world hunger, war, disease and poverty; but why can’t we each solve the pain in our own lives? Emotions, especially those “unhappy” ones, are the least understood and most poorly managed area of self-awareness. Surprisingly, pain contains the remedy to your suffering?

Many people find that emotions bog them down. They think if only they could live without emotions, life would be so much easier! Unfortunately, I found that when people try to eliminate their emotions, those emotions just get worse. Suppressing emotions does not work, and ignoring how you feel eventually makes you feel worse, where you remain stuck too long. It’s time to learn how to use your emotions as they were intended – to help you see the source of pain and guide you into peace.

Although it can be a bit scary to allow and work with strong feelings, I assure you, you can handle it all. You are greater than your feelings and they will serve you when you take conscious control of them. The goal is complete safety to be you and to handle all that this world brings you. Central to this work are listening to yourself and trusting what you hear. That’s the only way to know your own limits while engaging yourself fully in transcending them. You alone can monitor and protect your sense of safety.

Thankfully, the age of blindly following anyone or anything is coming to an end. Taking responsibility for our circumstances and taking initiative to improve those circumstances are vital steps to take better care of ourselves. You can do it, one feeling at a time.

Here are some situations you can overcome by working mindfully with your emotions:

  • You may have the occasional bad day or bothersome incident and want to get over it.
  • You may have persistent unpleasant emotions that seem inescapable.
  • You may have shut down your feeling to survive.
  • Maybe a desire for love and joy requires that you awaken.
  • You may have suffered trauma, and that pain holds you back.
  • You may have already worked on your past but want to get to a higher well-being.
  • Perhaps you’d like a powerful set of tools to help others with their pain.

No one can do the work for you but the information and is now available. Meditate! And include your emotions in your meditation. Get present and clear using any technique you know (Kundalini Yoga works fast!). Then invite emotions in by allowing whatever is troubling you to surface. It will feel bad at first, but soon you find a balance you can handle. Now the truth and soul’s wisdom can be heard when you simply as your intuition for answers.

That’s the SOS Method! Simple, straight and always available within you. I can’t wait to share the incredible depths of this healing system with you this year, so we can all be in control of our happiness – one feeling at a time! If you want to really get it, join me and GuruMeher for the annual Emotional Liberation 2016 Courses beginning Feb 3rd (online) and 6th (live).

Live or Online, support yourself with this powerful and proven structure of professional coaching, rich self-study and meditation practice, and friendly peer support to unlock the therapeutic power of your emotions.

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The 4 Pillars of Growth, Change and Healing

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· January 5, 2016 
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The 4 Pillars of Growth, Change and Healing

The future of therapy is self-therapy, the future of psychological healing is self-healing. Because we each have all the information about a situation, our needs and unique solutions already inside, we ourselves are in the best position to consciously correct. The job of therapists, counselors and healers is shifting to teaching us how to use our self-healing system.

We are all recovering from something that life brings, always learning to rebound from challenge and chance. So in this new partnership between you and those who help, the responsibility is shifted to you, and with it, all the power to access the answers unique to you. Training is still needed. Teachers can help you obtain the four things you will need on your journey:  Information, Practice, Support, and Inspiration

Information: Until we are all trained from birth to trust ourselves and use our intuitive knowing, we need to know what others have discovered through their own journey, trial and error. “Learn through time, or learn through a teacher.” They come in many forms: Self- Improvement books, spiritual books ancient and modern, classes, the vast Web.  Your upbringing, even the best environments, brought you a narrow and biased slice of reality. Sometimes just one powerful quote opens the doors.

Practice: Once you find some truth, you have to use it, apply it, make it come alive in you as direct experience. That gym membership card in your wallet, and great books on your shelf can’t do the work.  Putting your focus and effort over time to polish away the cloudiness and pain, build resilience and strength… it’s a workout. Assets like Will, Discipline, Willingness are needed. But Courage, Love and Compassion may be more your avenue. Some of both are best. A regular, rhythmic personal practice is part of every path to skill and mastery. Don Juan said there are many different paths; find a path with heart, and follow it to the very end.

Support: Steady constant development can be a challenge until a healthy habit is set. We all need structure, just like the timbers that hold up a house. You need to find the support that makes it all work and keep on working for you. Your own commitment is the foundation. That can come from pain or a driving desire for something good, or a simple knowing that something is right and must be done. Then you need clear actions, the actual “to do’s”. Next comes the time and place to do it. How do you fit it into your day? Sometimes hard choices are required to prioritize your well-being investments. To keep it all together you need outside support too: people who get you and what you are doing, who practice with you or cheer you on, who recognize your efforts and can see your gains. All of these elements can be found together in classes, courses and meetings whether private with a buddy, in local live groups, or virtual and recorded formats. Support groups are one of the best self-improvement tools discovered in the last century and are now in the web. Find what works for you, then work it!

Inspiration: Some spark will have started all of this for you, and you will need to renew your motivation if you are to reach your self-promised land.  The hero’s journey has many low moments that can derail the entire thing, or serve to refresh and renew. Inspiration can come from internal and external sources. At times your progress inspires and energizes, and sometimes you need some outside encouragement to keep up. You can have these known and ready in ample supply so you know where to go when you are low.

Information, Practice, Support and Inspiration…

They are constantly interwoven and may ebb and flow in changing proportion. Which of these 4 are strong in your life, and which are needed in greater measure? Assess where you are and how you are going to grow. When these are in place and working, you will see your self-healing power flourish.

“All therapies, and all help, and all knowledge are going to be absolutely obsolete. People need immediately self-exalted experience. And that is what the whole essence of human life is.”    –  Yogi Bhajan

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Resolve Not to Resolve

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· December 23, 2015 
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Resolve Not to Resolve

It wouldn’t be New Year’s without resolutions, right? But how did you fare last year when you resolved to stop a bad habit? Sometimes, the more you try to deny a desire, the more it increases, the more you want the thing (a drink, food, an unhealthy relationship). On top of that, unfilled “wants” can bring up Anger, and judgement of desires creates Shame. So, this year, instead of trying more and pushing harder, try  a softer approach: resolve not to resolve!

Think about the great masters who enjoy freedom from the constant seeking of pleasure that drive most of us. They have desire but it is for things as they are. When there is no striving for or resistance to things, life flows. Peace is possible under any circumstance.

Most regular folks do have desires and we do need them! Every day there are a million things we need just to stay alive, plus a whole lot more to thrive. Desire can lead to contentment and fulfillment, but what do you do when you can’t move forward on a resolution or a promise to yourself or someone else? Sometimes the best strategy is surrender.

If you don’t think you can, you don’t know how, you can’t find the power or the way, if you are stuck or frustrated, this is the time to stop everything. When you lose energy, interest, motivation, you can reevaluate your beliefs and approaches, an even break old patterns. Letting go of the old restores your energy and allows you to see life with new clarity.

So if you are feeling the blahs, the blues or lethargy about the past year and anxiety or frustration about prospects for the year ahead, don’t resist or grasp. Honor and allow it all. This brings release and relaxation. As with all low energy emotions, there is a fear of being engulfed if you surrender. But emotion is energy in motion, it moves things and then moves on. The SOS Method is about learning to trust your emotions. By being willing to feel bad things, you gain confidence to go into the darkness. We find the light that always rises.

If you are ready to find out what you really want, or don’t want, in 2016, then try this: Get peaceful, do some long deep breathing, then allow yourself to really feel what you are feeling. You can ask the emotion the following questions:

  • What do I need to know or do?
  • Is there something I could let go of that would help me?
  • Am I ready to deal with or change something about my circumstances that will bring me relief?
  • Do I just need to relax and restore?
  • Can I feel a sense of confidence that everything will be taken care of?

Remember, Surrender breaks you free from attachments and outdated ambitions that no longer serve you. It brings rest and renewal. Ultimately, it connects you to the source of all power. It teaches you to let go and let the universe do the work.

In the pursuit of knowledge, every day something is added.

In the practice of the Tao (the Way), every day something is dropped.

Less and less do you need to force things, until finally you arrive at non-action.

When nothing is done, nothing is left undone.

True mastery can be gained by letting things go their own way.

It cannot be gained by interfering.

-Tao Te Ching, 16

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The Holiday un-Checklist

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· December 11, 2015 
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This is NOT a list of things to buy, clean, cook, prepare or even do for the holidays. This is a list for YOU and by YOU of sanity-saving Self-Care tips for the season. It doesn’t matter if you were naughty or nice. Feel free to get creative and add even more. Then print, post where you can see it frequently, and pass it along!

____Remember Your Breath. If you are feeling stressed and overwhelmed by family obligations and holiday parties, then turn to your breath. It is always there for you like a loyal, unwavering friend. From the very first moment of your life, your next breath is provided for you, without a thought. Be greedy with your breath and take in as much as you need to calm, clear and nourish yourself.  You can also invite a friend, colleague, or spouse to take a few deep breaths with you!

____Be Generous to Yourself. During this season of giving, don’t forget about what YOU need. This does not necessarily mean to go buy yourself an expensive gift. For every external wish, there is an internal want. So take a moment and tune out all the external voices and non-stop holiday music. Get quiet, maybe meditate, then ask yourself, what do I really NEED? Listen for the voice inside of you. The answer may surprise you. Then take action and do what the voice says!

____Feed your Spirit.  With all the socializing combined with stress, sometimes we self-sooth by overeating, drinking and indulging. So when you experience Hunger, Desire, Cravings or even Addiction this season, be sure to feed yourself with what you really need. So before you stuff yourself, see what Soul wants. Is it a hug, a phone call with a friend, to pet your dog or cat, or perhaps a moment alone?

____Get Conscious About Your Emotions. Spending time with family can be amazing but also challenging. No one can press buttons like the ones you love! If heavy emotions arise for you, like Anger, Fear, or Guilt, don’t suppress them, trust them. Of course, you don’t want to explode either. This may feel good for a few minutes but will not bring the results you want.  So take a walk, do some yoga, and get conscious. This way you have the choice, and your voice, to use your emotions effectively.

____Take the Pressure Off. Sometimes our minds can conjure up what the perfect holiday should look like. Or maybe we saw it in a movie.  Or we see someone else and imagine she has the perfect tree, haircut, family and life. But if we compare, we are doomed. This is the time to focus on what we have rather than what we feel we may lack. Take a moment right now to acknowledge the gifts in your life. You probably have more than you think! Perfectionism can be punishing and life is an ever-changing cycle. This Christmas or Hanukkah will be different than last and will definitely be different than next. The key to contentment is accepting exactly what is, right now.

My Self-Care tips:  ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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Happy Holidays..?

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· December 8, 2015 
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Here’s the problem with the holidays, and an invitation to solve it.

There is a basic conflict in the way we have come to celebrate these winter holidays that creates stress and problems for a lot of people. I hope you’ll take a few minutes to understand this phenomena, with the goal being to find your own true way to the peace and joy we all need so much.

Bio-Rhythmic Balance

All of non-equatorial life on this planet evolved to the cycle of summer and winter energies. When the sun is hot and the day is long, living things are busy and productive with the business of sustenance. When the nights are cold and long, living things survived by going inside, underground and dormant. This was a time to embrace the darkness, rest and conserve one’s resources to emerge with the returning of the light, restored and ready for the business of the warm months.

This urge to hibernate also serves an important role in emotional cleansing and spiritual awakening. The slow, dark elements urge us to inner exploration, to release and resolve the many pressures of life for which there’s little time to process in times of great activity. 

But we are by nature afraid of the dark, and therefore of the depth’s of our psyche in the invisible world of all that we feel but cannot see. Our comfort zone is in the external, the physical, the busy and the bright. So human cultures developed traditions to keep spirits bright during the dark winter months with fire, lights, food, family, heightened by elevating stories and conversations of love all to feed the spirit.

But maybe we went too far. We developed electric lights and 24/7 Walmart shopping opportunities, in other words, the resources to avoid the darkness. We find ourselves getting super busy when nature is inviting us to be quiet. Social coziness becomes social demands. Simple sharing becomes lists of stuff to do and to buy. Gratitude becomes obligation. And exhaustion replaces restoration. Any interest was lost, stress is the cost.

Love and joy need a source of fuel just as your body needs calories. When a person is tired and at the end of their resources – physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually – she or he is in a survival mode in which generosity of the heart runs out of juice. When emotional batteries are drained, we can’t force and artificially create good will. Rather, it must flow naturally.

So my challenge to you is to examine this conflict within yourself, this misuse of resources. How will you find your balance this winter in this holiday season so that your spirit shines forth warmly and naturally?

Please send me your ideas about how you can, or begin to, find your natural rhythm and restoration of the Spirit. Next week I will share your ideas with everyone along with my own. Together we can forge our own spiritual traditions to create, at least for ourselves, peace on earth.

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9 Survival Skills for the Holidays

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· November 21, 2015 
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I hope you get along great with your family, but in that crucible of survival many habit-forming harms happened. Even if outright abuse was avoided (and the statistics are sad), our subconscious holds the shocks and shapes our lives to react like tsunami survivors.

Many of us return to ground zero this time of year, so gear up for those triggers and know how to become immune. That is, to live as you, free of the fear and smallness you once (and may still) live with.

Studies of disaster survivors reveal the 9 key traits and abilities that determine who dies, who survives, and why. These apply to all of us. It turns out that all of them are skills we practice in Senses of the Soul! You are a survivor of your own history. Here are the factors proven to be essential for survival and recovery.

– Be present and self-aware in your body and senses versus checked out and lost in thought and emotion.

In order to take care of yourself, you need to be mindfully in touch with what is really happening and what you need. Awareness precedes effective remedy.

– Humbly respect the powerful forces in and around you and respond accordingly versus careless, arrogant, ignorant, naïvete.

When you don’t underestimate or ignore the impact of events and your own feelings by trying to muster on like nothing’s wrong,  then you can be honest about the harm, the pain and the desire to be strong.

– High level of Self-care, kindly & compassionately attending to our own well-being versus neglectful, care-taking-of-others, doormat or martyr behavior.

Enough said. Take care of yourself. Compassionately know what you feel, what you need and figure out how to get it. Catch up with neglected needs, then take care of new situations in real time.

– Take Responsibility for your situation, taking initiative to solve versus blaming, complaining or waiting helplessly for someone to save, fix, or take care of you.

When you sit still, go inside, allow and confront consciously the darkness and pain inside, do all that you can to deal and heal yourself…you are always rewarded with relief and elevation.

– Resilience and Hardiness.

By practicing yoga and meditative exercises that challenge our body and confront our imagined weaknesses, we proactively take on a body/mind fitness training that repeatedly shows we can handle ourselves. This builds strength of will, trust in ourselves, and reserve capacity to call upon when hard times hit.

– Hope and Purpose; a reason to live which will sustain us and give extra energy when times are tough.

When you are in touch with your deepest longings and needs and your highest aspirations – the soul’s purpose – you will never be without motivation and hope. This take patience, practice and subtlety to go deeper that the many daily emergencies of the earth.

– Connectedness versus isolation and loneliness.

Our primary work is to be connected to ourselves for emotions and soul. This is the most reliable and highest form of connection, and makes it easier to connect to everything outside ourselves.

– Locating our self, Knowing that we have a place and where we are in relation to everything else.

With SOS we do this continually, to know what we’re feeling and why, and we discover a greater sense of the vastness of the universe and our very important place in it. We create a sense of safety not from the world alone but within ourselves.

– Managing emotions versus getting lost in them.

Well, this is our entire Senses of the Soul skill set.

So for your holiday survival and healing, practice these, starting with what ever is most missing from your repertoire. Stand strong at ground zero and heal thyself!

 If you would like a hand’s-on results-guaranteed training in these skills, join me for Emotional Liberation 2016.

And be happy these holidays by removing whatever is blocking it!

In gratitude, GuruMeher

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Categories : Trauma, Uncategorized

Work with Anger to Find your Power

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· June 15, 2015 
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ANGER – A Senses of the Soul Definition

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· June 9, 2015 
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Lisa on DESIRE

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 22, 2015 
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Emotional Healing Zone #1

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· April 15, 2015 
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Video Meditation: Overcome Anxiety – Be Clear When You Feel Fear

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· April 16, 2015 
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Lisa On Fear

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· April 27, 2015 
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Categories : Uncategorized

SOS Workshop Experience

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 6, 2015 
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Categories : SOS Newsletter, Uncategorized

SOS DESIRE Meditation – Create Contentment

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· May 11, 2015 
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Categories : Uncategorized

The Bliss Point

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
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Do you know about the “Bliss Point”? It is a combination of sugar, fat and salt that food scientists have found to be totally satisfying to the human tongue.  Every fantastic meal you’ve ever had in your life, from the Salmon en Papillote at that five-star restaurant to your grandmother’s Thanksgiving stuffing, was crafted on that special Bliss Point balance.  If feels good to be fed in this combination!

There is another kind of Bliss Point in this life.  Yes, you know the kind I mean- Spiritual Bliss. Just as you are wired to crave sugar, salt and fat, you also have a deep longing for that ultimate sense of well-being, that feeling of being totally at HOME in the Universe: Bliss.

As a term, Bliss has been used so casually it may be thought of as something trite.  Phrases like “Follow your Bliss,” or, “Blissed out,” make the experience sound like something you can find while flipping through a magazine.  Let’s get clear on what Bliss really is.

Bliss is a well-defined State of Consciousness (See Power vs. Force by David Hawkins).  Described classically in spiritual literature, Bliss is physical-mental-emotional- spiritual experience of Peace, Love, Clarity, and Vastness.  Beautiful, isn’t it?

The achievement of Bliss is possible but it is, in fact, a relatively rare in human experience. True Bliss isn’t as easy as the food chemist would have you believe.  You can’t just grab a snickers and call it a day!

Spiritual disciplines provide methods to achieving bliss and we have all felt the clues leading us there. The hard work part is to remove all obstacles to Bliss. Many spiritual disciplines ask you to develop self-awareness and self-control.  No matter how you chose to get there, you will definitely need to deal with things like:

·  Fear and Insecurity

·  Guilt and Low-Self-esteem

·  Anger, Depression and Grief.

Which is what we do in Senses of the Soul.  Most real Bliss methods take time and the short-term experience may be more uncomfortable than pleasant.

If all of this sounds like a big project, it is!  But taking on the “project” to achieve bliss has a huge payoff.  And as Rumi said, “Take on a huge, foolish project. It makes absolutely no difference what others think!”

So start a spiritual practice, deal with unresolved issues, work with your emotions, heal relationships, practice self-love, serve others, get your finances in order, clean your clutter. All self-improvement are steps on this path toward the real bliss. This requires discipline and commitment over time but it will give you the experience you seek.

When, through deep commitment, you can go beyond the focus on the self to transcend the limitations of personality, the experience of unlimited Vastness and Freedom become very available.

Your mind becomes quiet.  You listen deeply.  You gain clarity.  You become neutral.  And as these elements become stable and deeply grounded as your predominant and unshakeable experience, they mature into Bliss.

That alluring blend of Peace, Love, Clarity, and Vastness: Bliss!
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Categories : Uncategorized

When Your Emotions Are Out Of Control

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
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Here’s a closely held belief about emotions: they get out of control. Every felt that way?  Who hasn’t?
Whether it’s having a blow-out with a family member over something that, on the surface, seems all too insignificant.  Or harboring deep hurt and resentment in the workplace for personal some slight you perceived.  It can sometimes, or even often, feel like emotions take over and start running the show.
If your a conscious person, this experience can be pretty uncomfortable. You regret the way you behave when you have strong emotions.  You feel shameful of the way you lashed out at your partner, or the way your depression is spilling into your friendships.  So that you don’t have to have these overwhelming outbursts,  you cut your feelings off.  What else can you do?  They are out of control!
Here’s the truth of it: Emotions have a primitive nature. They arise automatically from our instinctual selves.  But they don’t have to overpower you.  In fact, when you learn to relate to and direct your intense feelings, you can actually harness great power.
To be the master of your feelings, you must understand their job and let them do it.  Just like you don’t want your Emotions ruling you, they don’t want you ruling them.  Nobody likes a tyrant.  Your feelings have a message for you.  Sitting,  Breathing, Listening,  Consciously Cooperating and the Guiding your feelings is the way to emotional healing, clarity and purpose.   Because with the right fines, your feelings become workhorses for your wellness.
So here’t the real truth – you may think emotions can control you, but really emotions are controlled by your Awareness!
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Categories : Uncategorized

How to Solve Your Problems

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
· No Comments
 How have you been feeling lately? What are you feeling right now?
Anxious about a job?  Sad or Depressed about a fight you had with a loved one recently?  Frustrated by a problem you can’t seem to solve?
The flow of emotions is constant, up and down, mild and intense. But know this: The painful is ALWAYS your guide to the pleasant.
Just yesterday I heard, “Emotions wreak havoc on my energy.  Fear make me run around crazy.  Next I’m hot and angry, picking fights with everyone. Then really low, feeling hopeless about it all. It’s a roller coaster to hell with no clear way out.”  Yes, Emotions bring you very specific qualities of energy; and that is a key to putting them to work solving your problems.
As I mentioned in the last newsletter, emotions have primitive energy that, without awareness, can take over and run you ragged. The testimonial above from a client of mine is common.  And have you ever noticed that when the problem you are facing gets bigger, your emotions around it get more intense? It can be a draining and confusing experience.  But I’m here to tell you that you need not disintegrate into an emotional mess!
If you want to solve your problems – big, small, or larger than life – you have to know this one thing:
Emotions bring you the right energy of the job.
Need to look for a new job?  You bet your anxiety is going to get larger as the problem persists.  Youneed that amount of intensity to motivate and support your search!  Need to take some time for self-care after an intense confrontation with a loved one?  Your sadness creates a quiet, inward-looking space conducive to reflection and healing before moving forward.
You can solve everything in your world – literally everything – when you feel your feelings and understand them as a source of information and energy you require to change the circumstances that created those feelings.
Fear gives you the energy to wake up to danger.  Sadness slows you down so you can let go.  Anger brings the intensity to act with integrity and intention.  To heal and resolve you troubles, these are the best and most immediate tools you have. So begin to work with the type and amount of energy in your emotions. they will always be just what you need, when you can read and utilize them.

 

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Categories : Uncategorized

How To Deal with Boredom and Apathy

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
· No Comments

Here’s a question I got in an email last week:

Hi, GuruMeher. I’m curious. I’ve noticed that the dominant thing I’m  feeling today seems to be “boredom.” But I don’t think boredom is an emotion. How can I dig deeper and find the emotion?

I’m sure a lot of you feel this way sometimes. You’re not exactly sad or discouraged, but you feel uninspired by life.  This concerns you because you believe that you should feel more joyful, engaged and excited by things.  I understand.

Boredom isn’t an actual emotion so to speak. Boredom could be more classified as an energy.  It’s is a slow, inward reaching vibration that has elements of apathy (commonly called Depression), sadness (Grief) and inadequacy (Fear). Unaddressed, boredom can progress into actual Depression.   However, on it’s own, boredom is actually quire useful!

When approached with awareness, Boredom leads to Peace.

I spent years working with a coach to help me with what I like to term a “raging workaholic” problem. After a working together for some time, we were successful in reducing my workload and “unhooking” from the subconscious drivers of my need to work endlessly.  It felt great!  But then came the day I felt bored.

“Boredom is the Gatekeeper of Peace,” the coach had said.  That notion made no sense to me at the time. Feeling bored was scary.  What if I never achieved anything again?  I’d been so amped in my workaholic mode that this neutral energy I was now living in felt dangerous.  I was tempted to throw out all the progress I had made and go back to my old ways.  But I decided to try this idea of Boredom leading to Peace and see where it took me. It worked out!

When I allowed Boredom to become Peace, I got comfortable moving more slowly. The feeling boredom actually lead me to deep clarity about what was most important to me and how I really wanted to spend my time. Tasks became manageable and I was even able to accomplish more than I had before. In place of adrenaline rushes, I began to experience tranquil satisfaction.

Now you may come to boredom through another story such as a lack of meaningful purpose, unachieved dreams, delayed fulfillment, or an unclear or blocked path, to name a few.  The key is not to fear this state as something wrong, but accept it.  Not every day is a carnival.  But if you can stay neutral and calm during these “bored periods” you too can experience a deeper more complete kind of satisfaction, one that has true meaning for you.  So, I say, “Fear not Boredom; make it your friend!”

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Categories : Uncategorized

Fall Blues or Blessing

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
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ARTICLE: FALL BLUES OR BLESSING?

Seasonal changes. Have they hit you this week? Or does your mood begin to swing with the first cold snap, shorter days, and back-to-school memories? As the vibrant, high energy of summer fades, the quiet, subdued tone of fall can come with some melancholy.

You may have had a fun summer, enjoyed adventure and expansion. You may prefer your freer lifestyle activities to the busy focus of the fall. You miss those good times and want them to continue, and that can bring a tinge of sadness.

Time moves on, and this “bummer” experience is actually natural and meant to help you grow.  The bittersweet feelings of the transition into fall help us to do something wonderful.  They help us to recognize our values!

Maybe you valued the time you had to engage in self-care activities like sleeping in or going to the beach. Perhaps it’s that element of adventure that’s really meaningful.  It could be the time you got to spend with friends and family.  Heck, maybe you just like the quality of summer sunlight more!

Whatever it is that you really loved about the summer time, let that love be a permanent imprint on your heart.  Then let that heart-based value system flow into the fall.

When you identify and relate to the underlying qualities in experiences-their inner essences-those essences are abundantly available within other experiences too!

A great practice would be to spend some time going over your favorite summer memories, dwelling and enjoying each one.  Then, take that joyous energy and apply it to the fall. How can you enjoy the soft, cozy mood of fall, even though it was such a contrast to your energetic, extroverted summer?

What I love about this process is that it’s the same for any change.  Whether that be the change from one job to another, from living in one city and then moving or even the change of going from single to in a relationship, or back to single!.  It’s the process of enjoying life on both ends!

Nothing lasts forever except for the soul. Even the most delicious meal only tastes good when we’re hungry. The only way to get enough is to relate to life from the soul perspective.  Then every experience is a treat!

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Categories : Uncategorized

You Have All The Answers: An SOS Success Story

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
· No Comments

FEELING, HEALING AND GLOBAL PEACE

I recently received an email that blew me out of the water.  It reminded me of why I created SOS .
We all have the ability to use our heavy emotions for strength and healing, but most people don’t know it yet.  My mission for SOS is that whenever we feel bad, we can know 1. What we are feeling, 2. Why we are feeling it, and 3. What to do about it to feel better.  I want to contribute to people’s emotional wellness as well as to the health and well-being to the world.
I have a very specific vision for world peace – that we all take control of our own happiness. That requires thoughts and emotions – our inner life – to serve us.  When we create the circumstances where our emotions serve us, rather than sabotage us, we eliminate suffering.  How can you truly suffer if every bit of pain actually serves to bring you to your highest happiness? That’s what SOS is all about.
So it is encouraging and makes me happy to hear that people are gaining these skills through the SOS method.  I received the incredible message below in response to last week’s video.
Hi GuruMeher,
I did last weeks Google+ Hangout video for the 
third time. I am using it whenever I feel a 
strong emotion or a difficult emotion 
to bring me insight, clarity, and peace.
Following the steps of the video I learned that
some depression I felt was in response to my
perceptions of someone close to me trying to
control my behavior. I further learned that the depression
was showing me that I needed to find my voice
and speak up, most importantly be true to my self and my
needs. I did not feel much of this depression following
the realization.
Tonight I am feeling a lot of anxiety. I learned 
that the anxiety was telling me that I did not have to be a certain
way or even a certain person for my mother. I just need to be myself.
I also don’t need to have an immaculate home or prepare
extravagant meals. I am tired and I want to just be, to just be me.
I still am experiencing some anxiety, so I am going to
now try and go deeper through additional meditation
to see if there is anything further I need to learn before
I can feel more peaceful. 
 
I love the simplicity with which we can know how to find peace.. Do you see how this SOS practitioner 1. Stopped to feel, 2. Discovered why she was feeling that way and 3. Discovered what to do about it?  The 4th step in the healing process is to take action on that inner guidance and I’ll be talking about that in this week’s Google+ Hangout.  This Friday’s hangout is the fifth in a series that together are a total introduction to the SOS method.
I hope that this message inspires and encourages you as it did me. In just 12 minutes, with this simple SOS practice, our friend was able to deal with deep feelings of depression and anxiety, some of which stemmed back all the way to her childhood relationship to her mother.  It’s pretty wonderful how healing can happen so fast and be so profound. Imagine the impact that will have on the planet when enough of us know how to move quickly from upset to peaceful.
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Categories : Uncategorized

How to Be Happy: An Inside Job

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 26, 2014 
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You are not subject to circumstances. You are not a victim. But amidst substantial abundance, there is still so much suffering. Here’s a quote that sums up why I have spent 35 years practicing and teaching yoga and meditation:

Sometimes we operate under the misconception that we can control the circumstances
of the outside world. What we can do is control our inside worlds. That is a gift given
to us. And that is where we must start.

    – Yogi Bhajan
This means that, come what may, a person can create a good life, can find peace and happiness.
Yoga is the art of gaining control of the inner world of body, thoughts and, yes, even our feelings. We can all learn to do that. Granted, the more traumatized we’ve been and the more stressed we are, the more practice it takes.  The key is in the old Serenity Prayer:
“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”
You can’t change a traumatic past, but you can use it to heal and grow.
Having some control over HOW YOU FEEL is a vital skill  to being happy in this very random world. I would like to see  every human have this basic skill – When you feel bad, you know:
  • What you are feeling.
  • Why you are feeling it.
  • What to do to feel better.
  • How to take that action.
  • …So that you feel bertter.
Repeated often enough, you will be in good shape… happy within the past or present that you cannot change, having acted to change what you can. This is why I am so eager to bring Senses of the Soul to all who will use it. It gives you so much control of that inner life, BUT we control emotions by allowing them to work – not repressing them.
Here is another quote. It so simply describes this Senses of the Soul work:
“Working by your heart means using your feelings and emotions to lead you to your
spiritual sense of existence.”

 – Yogi Bhajan, February 15, 1984
Putting these three ideas together, we see that we can find our way to happiness through our feelings.
Here is an example from an SOS workshop here in L.A. just last weekend.  A woman shared this after a simple 11 minute exercise and guided meditation
“In my meditation…
I felt a great sadness from the recent death of my grandmother.
Then came suddenly a memory of feeling abandoned in my crib as a baby, and crying.
I felt so unwanted and unloved. I saw that it has seemed that way ever since, whether in or out of an intimate relationship.
So sad to realize I never found the love I needed.
I realized that my grandmother was the only person in my life that I ever felt loved by.
I traveled back as my current self and held my infant self. I just gave myself the love I had been wanting for so long.
So simple, now I know I can give that to myself all the time.

(The meditation was Replay and Roleplay with Paranoia Flush, pg. 95-96 In Senses of the Soul book and audiobook.)

The woman above couldn’t change the past, and can’t make anyone love her. But by the smile and peace on her face. I can tell you, she was able to get the love she needed. Love was within her inner control.

This is how trauma is healed: when you can do for yourself now what you couldn’t  do then.  When you can get what you need now that you couldn’t get then.
We can create happiness, get what we need, regardless of circumstances. How? Take responsibility. Know it is possible. Sit and be real and deal with it, and BE with yourself. Work on happiness like a fitness plan. Spend time daily creating happiness, because…
“Happiness is your birthright.”  – Yogi Bhajan

 

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Categories : Uncategorized

4 Easy Methods of Personal Growth

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· September 25, 2014 
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The future of therapy is self-therapy, the future of psychological healing is self-healing. Because we each have all the information about a situation, our needs and unique solutions already inside, we ourselves are in the best position to consciously correct.   The job of therapists, counselors and healers is shifting to teaching us how to use our self-healing system.

We are all recovering from something that life brings, always learning to rebound from challenge and change. So in this new partnership between you and those who help, the responsibility is shifted to you, and with it, all the power to access the answers unique to you. Training is still needed. Teachers can help you obtain the four things you will need on your journey:  Information, Practice, Support, and Inspiration.

Information: Until we are all trained from birth to trust ourselves and use our intuitive knowing, we need to know what others have discovered through their own journey, trial and error. “Learn through time, or learn through a teacher.” They come in many forms: Self- Improvement books, spiritual books ancient and modern, classes, the vast Web.   Your upbringing, even the best environments, brought you a narrow and biased slice of reality. Sometimes just one powerful quote opens the doors.

Practice: Once you find some truth, you have to use it, apply it, make it come alive in you as direct experience. That gym membership card in your wallet, and great books on your shelf can’t do the work.  Putting your focus and effort over time to polish away the cloudiness and pain, build resilience and strength… it’s a workout. Assets like Will, Discipline, Willingness are needed. But Courage, Love and Compassion may be more your avenue. Some of both are best. A regular, rhythmic personal practice is part of every path to skill and mastery. Don Juan said there are many different paths; find a path with heart, and follow it to the very end.

Support: Steady constant development can be a challenge until a healthy habit is set. We all need structure, just like the timbers that hold up a house. You need to find the support that makes it all work and keep on working for you. Your own commitment is the foundation. That can come from pain or a driving desire for something good, or a simple knowing that something is right and must be done. Then you need clear actions, that actual “to do’s”. Next comes the time and place to do it. How do you fit it into your day? Sometimes hard choices are required to prioritize your well-being investments. To keep it all together you need outside support too: people who get you and what you are doing, who practice with you or cheer you on, who recognize your efforts and can see your gains. All of these elements can be found together in classes, courses and meetings whether private with a buddy, in local live groups, or virtual and recorded formats. Support groups are one of the best self-improvement tools discovered in the last century and are now in the web. Find what works for you, then work it!

Inspiration: Some spark will have started all of this for you, and you will need to renew your motivation if you are to reach your self-promised land.  The hero’s journey has many low moments that can derail the entire thing, or serve to refresh and renew. Inspiration can come from internal and external sources. At times your progress inspires and energizes, and sometimes you need some outside encouragement to keep up. You can have these known and ready in ample supply so you know where to go when you are low.

Information, Practice, Support and Inspiration…They are constantly interwoven and may ebb and flow in changing proportion. Which of these 4 are strong in your life, and which are needed in greater measure? Assess where you are and how you are going to grow. When these are in place and working,you will see your self-healing power flourish.

“All therapies, and all help, and all knowledge are going to be absolutely  obsolete. People need immediately self-exalted experience. And that is  what the whole essence of human life is.”    –  Yogi Bhajan

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Categories : Uncategorized

THE END OF SUFFERING – You Have The Power

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· August 29, 2014 
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Pain is a certainty; suffering is optional.

You may have heard this; I’d like to help you live it. As a birthday gift to myself I went snowboarding yesterday. After a beautiful morning on the slopes I crashed and injured my head, wrist and ankle – ski patrol toboggan-ride down the mountain and all.

An afternoon in the emergency room for x-rays didn’t ruin my day, it just changed it. My body hurt/s and I lost the expected fun, but I chose to be grateful for an afternoon of love and care from friends, nurses and doctors. Too late to avoid the pain; s*** happens… and it did! But rather than beating myself up over my bad luck or how I could have avoided it (no longer an option), I did have a choice to love my body even with its injury, and appreciate how it works so well and is already healing itself.

Emotional hurt works the same as physical trauma. Life will bring events that evoke fear that shrinks you, cravings with their pleasure and pain, anger that can hurt and isolate you or others – and they are painful. But they are not meant to make you suffer.

Just like the nerves in my leg, emotions bring your attention to the source of pain so you can relieve it. Fear alerts you to danger, cravings to a need, and anger serves to protect you or get what you need. Suffering occurs when you don’t understand the source, or heed the call, or respond. So don’t just endure painful situations, disturbing patterns, unsatisfying relations, or any uncomfortable emotion. Use them to guide you to healing, strength and happiness.

It’s your natural sensory system; simple to learn to use it well. Find out for yourself that Pain is part of life, but you have a choice about the suffering.

Here is a simple technique to help you: Emotional Balance by Listening

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Categories : Uncategorized

Fear is Your Friend

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· July 14, 2012 
· No Comments

Everyone wants to be comfortable, safe, and enjoy life. Yet most people spend a lot of time struggling with worry, anxiety and uncertainty. These are all forms of fear, which create stress. Yoga offers many tools like posture, breath and meditation to calm the body, mind, and emotions. But you can go beyond just managing stress to resolving it at its source, by simply sitting down and talking to your fear.

As uncomfortable as tense muscles and churning thoughts can be, they are not the problem. Anxiety is a wise friend, simply bringing your attention to the problem. Ignoring anxiety or just living with it keep you from seeing whatever it is that has disturbed your well-being. Whether that is immediate physical danger, the threat of a past trauma, or the anticipation of future harm, fear gives you access to the wisdom and inner-guidance needed to bring you to peace.

So spend some quality time in the counsel of this friend.

-Sit still and breathe deeply.

-Let all bothersome worries and concerns come forth. Calmly feel it all.

-Ask the feelings what the exact threat is. Ask again until it is specific and clear.

-Then ask this inner wisdom what will take care of this for you.

This simple way of working with your fear usually brings immediate relief, just by paying attention to the sensations. Try it regularly as a form of meditation, or as part of your practice.

You may discover stress-releasing truths such as, “I see that actually everything is just fine right now”; the fear was leftover or habitual. Permanent peace requires remembering and using this “updated” information.

Other times you may see something that needs to be said or done to regain or remain in your comfort zone. Take action on that valuable information, then your fear will leave you alone until it is needed again.  In this way you will one-at-a-time clear up all the accumulated disturbing situations in your life. When they are clear, you experience a deep peace called Soul.

Human life will always bring challenge and change. Consciously use your natural fear response as a message to come back to inner peace. It will help you solve all the small stuff. And from the vast perspective of Soul, IT’S ALL SMALL STUFF!

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Sadness Opens the Heart

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· July 14, 2012 
· No Comments
 
Sadness opens the Heart
Grief developed early in our evolutionary history along with our instincts to acquire
for survival. It is part of the drive to go get, hold on to, and protect something that is
needed. But since impermanence and change are the nature of creation, things will
always come and go. The seasons pass, youth moves into aging, good times end,
memories and friends fade, pets and loved ones die and are gone. All are recycled,
reborn, renewed or replaced, but grief doesn’t see that.
Healthy sadness and grieving are useful and needed to say goodbye, let go, move on,
heal and become whole again, When the process is blocked, we remain stuck “in the past”
and cannot move on, be present, and enjoy “what is.”
By longing for what is lost, grief and sadness make clear what is important to us. With
that clarity, we can move on to find more of the same from other sources, or adapt by
focusing on other important values.
For a self-guided meditation on grieving and loss, go to:
http://sensesofthesoul.com/grief-sadness/
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Anger – Without Getting Burned

Posted by GuruMeher Khalsa 
· July 14, 2012 
· No Comments

Anger- it’s how you stay safe and handle everything this big world brings. You’d be dead without it! Anger is a form of personal power, it’s the fire in the belly that burns food into movement and gets things done. Anger isn’t good or bad, it’s how you use it. History, including yours, is an education in the use of anger/power, which we experience in 3 forms: weakness, force, and flow.

Weakness:  Repressed Anger

You first learn about anger through its absence. Believing you have no power, you are taken advantage of and unable to take care of yourself. Without the energy of anger you’ll feel weak, incapable, helpless, victimized, and hopeless. But this lifeforce is always present. When repressed it emerges as resentment, passive aggression, and self-defeating behavior.

Safely access anger-power by strengthening your navel center with yoga, martial arts, exercise. Befriend it in therapy and meditation. Use it to express needs, make requests, and set healthy boundaries. Power and protection lie in using your voice, making choices, and taking action.

Force: Expressed Anger

From the first “No!” in the “terrible two’s” to the cruelty of tyrants, the discovery of Force is followed by the learning process of its use and abuse. Expressed as rage and violence, it damages and destroys. But harnessed as determination and drive it motivates effective action and accomplishment. By trial and error we learn that anger channeled into empowerment brings protection and peace. Learn to process it consciously by understanding what is bothering you, what you need, then taking action to handle it.

Flow: Higher Power

Conscious use of power brings high levels of wellbeing, contentment, and generosity to serve others.  Gratitude and humility follow, leading to the experience that power is not yours, but moves through you. Allowing the universe to take care of things brings access to the power that moves the galaxies. It cannot be gained by force, but is awakened by acceptance and trust in life’s flow.

What have you learned about anger/power in your life’s study? Using it ever more skillfully brings the ability to thrive within life’s challenges, and the ability to fulfill your purpose. That freedom is the magnificent gift of Anger. Use it wisely!

Do it Now! – Meditation for Eliminating Deep Inner Anger

Recommended reading: Power vs. Force by David R. Hawkins

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